Bound in the Fade
by alexmancerx
Summary: The spirits of the Fade had always been drawn to Kayden, even when he was awake. Many treated him as a demon and the other apprentices were often scared of him. Then Duncan came, and so many things left unanswered; why were the spirits drawn to him, why Greagoir wished him tranquil? And how could he handle the Blight, the Fade and an Antivan assassin without losing himself?
1. Prologue: The Joining

_"In War, Victory. In Peace, Vigilance. In Death, Sacrifice."_  
_- Grey Warden motto_

He glided through Ostagar that night, a speck of white glimmering in the darkness. He had heard so many times that Ferelden smelled of mud and wet dog, and he noticed it all the more that night. The Tower didn't smell nearly this bad, but when it rained as often as it did and there were dogs and an entire army camped here, it was to be expected.

"I'll be just a minute, Alistair. I have to get this herb to the kennel master."

Alistair only nodded and he watched them continue on for a moment. His eyes wandered to the ground. It was dry now, but he could tell that the sky was threatening to fall at any moment. There would be mud again soon enough.

He was sweating by the time he reached the kennels. How could anyone live in this humidity? How could they think it was cold?

He heard a gasp and looked up from the ground to see the kennel master making a sign against evil.

"Oh, it's you! I do apologize, I thought you was a ghost..."

"I get that a lot," Kayden said as he handed over a white flower to the man, "Is this the herb you were looking for?"

"Yes, that's it! Thank you, this should help."

Kayden looked back at the ground for a moment. He wanted to ask, but he didn't know if it would be -.

"He should be fine in just a few days. Maybe come back and we'll see about imprinting him on you."

Was this man a mind reader? "Do you think that can be done?"

"Maybe, I've heard of it happening before. No harm in trying."

Kayden looked over the short fence at the sick and muzzled dog. He seemed to be having a peaceful sleep. That was good enough for him.

He nodded and thanked the kennel master when Alistair approached, "Duncan wants us to meet him at the temple. Let's get a move on, shall we?"

Kayden sighed, falling into step behind Alistair as they made their way to the old Temple where the Joining Ritual awaited him and the other recruits.

He had read about the history of the Blights back at the Circle Tower. The Blights, the Grey Wardens... It seemed so long ago that he sat in the Circle's library pouring over history books and magical texts. In all his time in the library, he had never come across anything about the Joining Ritual and he certainly never expected that one day he might join the Warden ranks.

Things like this seemed out of reach for him. The First Enchanter had called him lucky, and he really was. If it hadn't been for Duncan, who knew what sort of punishment would be awaiting for him now?

Alistair had a similar story about being rescued by Duncan. Alistair was an ex-Templar and that alone made him uneasy around the man. He joked often, though it seemed more of a defense than anything. He must be hiding so much. Kayden didn't want to pry, especially when it came to a Templar, but if they were going to be Wardens together, they would have to learn to get along. Alistair was nice so far, but Kayden still didn't trust him.

They walked to the temple in silence, the awkward type, finally breaking when he heard their other companions arguing. He wasn't interested in what they had to say and rolling his eyes he added, "Will the two of you quit it already? You're giving me a headache."

The Templar seemed amused, having wanted to say the same thing but had remained silent.

When Kayden met Ser Jory only a few hours previous, he had taken an instant disliking for the knight. The man showed the same prejudice he had come to expect from anyone that found out he was a mage. Maybe Niall had been right, people were always going to fear mages. He hadn't wanted Niall to be right, but here was his proof and it was only his first week out of the Tower.

Daveth wasn't much better. He was younger and less experienced than Ser Jory, but he had grown up on stories about the Wilds and their Witches and barbarians. Kayden may have not been an apostate or maleficarum from the Wilds, though he assumed that to people like Daveth there was little difference.

"Will the two of you just shut up already?" He crossed his arms, but again he was ignored. They only stopped when Duncan arrived, bringing a white, marble chalice to a small table nearby. He spoke of Joining and how he and the Wardens before him had drank the blood of the darkspawn and mastered their taint.

Ser Jory was not pleased by this. Kayden was not surprised; the man had seemed a coward the entire time they were in the Wilds and the younger Daveth seemed a sarcastic voice of reason. One that only annoyed him more.

Duncan turned to the Templar, "We speak only a few words prior to the joining, but those words have been said since the first. Alistair, if you would?"

He nodded, and slightly bowed his head as if to pray. Kayden closed his eyes and took in a deep breath, taking in the warm air around him. His heart was racing in anticipation. Mostly anticipation and a few parts fear; fear that he wouldn't survive the Joining.

"Join us, brothers and sisters. Join us in the shadows where we stand vigilant. Join us as we carry the duty that can not be forsworn. And should you perish, know that your sacrifice will not be forgotten. And that one day we shall join you."

"Daveth, step forward."

Kayden and Ser Jory watched in silence as the thief took the chalice and drank, and only a few seconds later the man clutched at his throat and convulsed in pain and torment until he lay dead at their feet.

Ser Jory looked on, pure terror filling his eyes as Duncan apologized to Daveth and asked the knight to step forward.

The horrified man was backing up to the stone wall behind him as he pulled out his sword.

"There is no turning back," Duncan said in a monotone. Had the man no compassion? He wanted to scream, but the young mage was too shocked to say anything. All he could do was watch.

"No! You ask too much! There is no glory in this!"

And then Duncan pulled out a dagger. The terrified knight lunged at him.

Duncan blocked a few blows with his dagger, still holding the chalice in his right hand and then plunged the dagger into the knight, "I am sorry, but the Joining is not yet complete."

Kayden's jaw dropped as the man hit the ground in a pool of blood. Duncan had been his savior, and now he wasn't sure what to think. He gulped, this would probably be it for him as well.

He closed his eyes, trying to drown out the images, hoping beyond hope that when they opened again, this nightmare would be over, or maybe his eyes wouldn't open again. It was either drink blood and the poison would kill him or he'd be killed by Duncan's blade. He wondered which was worse.

"You were called upon to submit yourself to the taint for the greater good," came Duncan's voice as he handed the chalice to Kayden. Everything was so far away now. He couldn't go back to the Tower, to Kirkwall...

He opened his eyes once more and looked down at the chalice, at the black blood and then, without thinking brought it to his lips taking a long drink. He stood there waiting to die, resigned to that fate. He could feel the hot tears forming in his eyes, and he mentally cursed himself for not leaving Alim on better terms. The elf probably hated him by now, and there was nothing he could to about it. They would never see each other again.

"From this moment forth, you are a Grey Warden."

Kayden turned to Alistair, and then his head began pounding. He could see the Temple no longer, instead there was darkness, and deep within that darkness a great dragon.

The dragon let out a roar, and Kayden could have sworn that it saw him. Then... nothing...


	2. Chapter 1: Warden's Fall

Author's Note: Hello everyone! I just wanted to say thank you for reading my Prologue. I first put that up to see if there might be any interest in continuing the story of my Warden. I was surprised and very glad to see that it was pretty well received even though it was completely unbeta'd. This time I have a beta, and hopefully the first chapter will be of better quality.

Thanks so much to ShebasDawn for her help! Your suggestions and insights were very much appreciated, and I think this chapter really benefited from your eye.

One thing to note, the beginning portion is a flash back and what he refers to as "the Dreams" is the Fade. When he was that young, he didn't have a word for it yet, and that seemed like it would make sense for the common person to refer to it that way. This is mainly because people outside of the Circle don't usually know what the Fade is.

Anyway, please enjoy this chapter! Sorry the AN was so long!

* * *

**Chapter 1: Warden's Fall**

**_Kirkwall, The Free Marches._**

**Winter of 9:20 Dragon.**

_"He's a demon!"_

_Kayden huddled next to the bedroom door, ear pressed against the wood. His mother was arguing with a woman, he did not know who. If he hadn't been terrified, he'd run out to defend her._

_"No, he's only a child, he's done nothing wrong."_

_"He's a mage! Have you even taken a good look at him? His hair, his skin, those eyes..."_

_"Just like his fathers..." he heard his mother whisper. He didn't know, he had never met his father. Did he have the same pale complexion and white hair as Kayden? And the same lyrium colored eyes? It was hard to believe that anyone would look like him, but it did make sense that he got his looks from somewhere other than the Dreams._

_Did being a mage really make him a demon? It might as well, mages here were usually sent to the Gallows. He shuddered at the thought, and crossed his room to the window, overlooking the courtyard. He had to get away before the Templars came._

_A crash came from outside, and he could hear the yelling of angry men. There was a bang at the front door. He jumped and looked for somewhere to hide. The cabinet maybe? He rushed over and stepped into it, closing the door behind him._

_"Hurry, Revka, we have to get him away from Kirkwall, tonight."_

_It was a man's voice this time, but he did not recognize it. He could just hear his mother's panicked breathing as she ran towards his room. The door burst open and she quickly packed a few things in a sack for him; some food, spare clothes, and other small things._

_"You are leaving with the Templars sooner than expected."_

_"But mother... what's going on?" he asked, peeking out of the cabinet. How did she always know?_

_"Don't talk back, be good now." She kissed him, brushing his white hair away from his eyes. She was trying her best to hide tears he could tell, but he had never seen her cry before. The situation was worse than he thought and he began shivering at the idea._

_"Am I to be sent to The Gallows?"_

_"No," the man said again, as he entered the room. Kayden was able to get a good look at him. He wore the uniform of a Templar. The Sword of Mercy on his breastplate, the rich maroon skirt, the chain, and the terrifying helmet that covered his face, were unmistakable._

_Kayden gasped and fell back into his mother's arms._

_"Do not be afraid, I am here to help you," he said._

o O o

"It is finished." Duncan said.

Kayden opened his eyes, two men were hovering over him. Where was he again?

He sat up and looked around.

"Two more dead. When I went through the Joining only one died, but it was still... horrible," Alistair shuddered.

He was told a war meeting was taking place and that King Cailan had asked for them to join, but he had a headache.

"Take some time," Duncan said, "You can meet us there when you're ready."

He nodded, and looked over toward the mage encampment, wondering if they had anything for a headache. Wynne was there, she would know.

Alistair helped him up and he brushed the dirt off of his robes, "Nothing you said could have prepared me for that."

Alistair chuckled and ruffled his hair, "You'll be fine."

Kayden scowled, "No reason to treat me like a child, I've taken the Harrowing you know."

Alistair shrugged, "I'm going with Duncan now. Come by when you're ready, I'm sure King Cailan would like to see you."

Damn templar, he thought. Well... ex-templar. Though Alistair wasn't much like any of the Templars he'd ever met, save one. He didn't want to think about that, it was so far in the past it didn't matter anymore.

Kayden pushed a strand of white hair behind an ear and rubbed his temples, then decided to hurry to the mage encampment; if he waited any longer he feared his head would explode.

_ o O o_

If it wasn't raining, the tower would probably be burning around them. Two soldiers had followed them into the Tower of Ishal, a tower that was now swarming with darkspawn. What luck.

They pressed on, killing all the darkspawn they saw as they made their way up the tower. He expected there to be a few here, but not this many, and Alistair seemed to be thinking the same thing when they reached the next floor.

"You could always try telling them they're in the wrong place," Kayden suggested, freezing the closest genlock.

"Right. Because clearly," Alistair sliced a hurlock across the chest, "this is all just a misunderstanding. We'll laugh about this later."

"Maybe. I never expected fighting darkspawn would be so much fun."

"Yes, this is a leisurely exercise to be sure."

Kayden smirked, and one of the soldiers looked at him like he was crazy, "Is now really the time for that?"

Another hurlock fell and Alistair pressed forward, "We have to hurry and light the beacon."

Kayden nodded, picking up the pace to run beside Alistair, "We're almost there."

They climbed the stairs, taking two, sometimes three or more at a time. He remembered only once running up the stairs in the Circle Tower like this, only to be scolded by one of the Templars for running indoors later. He had been excited about something then, what he couldn't remember. He must have been twelve at the time. The situation now was much more urgent.

When the reached the top of the stairs, Alistair stopped abruptly in front of him. Kayden almost slammed into the ex-templar, but was able to stop in time.

"Alistair, why did you stop. What is it?" He looked ahead. There was something big in the center of the circular room, and it appeared to be... eating. The body fell as the ogre stood up, and flexed it's muscles. It then turned its head to the newcomers and let out a guttural roar.

"Maker, that thing is ugly," Kayden blurted out, trying not to look at the very human body that had become the ogre's snack.

"You know, it might be stupid, but I'm sure it can understand that," Alistair said. He was speaking softly, hoping the ogre was hard of hearing.

He didn't have time to wonder if it did as the beast charged at them only seconds later. It took all his focus just to jump out of the way. The others had done the same and were now engaging it.

Kayden sent bolts of cold at the ogre, hoping to freeze it, anything to give the others an edge. He wished he knew just a few more spells; and maybe he'd be more helpful. He began casting weakness and vulnerability hexes, then enchanted their weapons with cold. He hoped it would be enough.

Unfortunately for him though, the ogre finally realized who was casting those spells and after punching one of the soldiers to a bloody pulp, turned its attention to Kayden.

It charged toward Kayden. When it was far enough away from the others, Kayden switched to heavier spells, ones that would have damaged everyone surrounding the ogre.

A cone of arctic air burst from his hands as the ogre grew closer, and he prayed it would stop it in its tracks before it could knock Kayden across the room. It was successful, but not before the ogre knocked his staff out of his hands.

It was frozen in place, but as he reached for his staff, the ogre came crumbling down on top of it, Alistair's sword buried deep in it's back.

"Hurry, light the beacon!"

He didn't have time to get his staff, and it had likely been broken by now. All that mattered was signaling reinforcements. He could hear the blood pumping in his ears as he raced across the room, pulling a flaming torch out of a sconce, he threw it into the pile of wood. It burst into flame, and he had to cover his eyes for a moment.

It was done.

He grinned, wiped the sweat from his brow with the sleeve of his robes and turned to Alistair, only to be stuck like a pin cushion. He looked down to see three arrows protruding from his chest. It was as if it was someone else's body, unreal.

Kayden's hand reached his chest as the blood began to ooze out, covering his robes and he fell back, hitting cold stone. Something hot dripped into his eyes, and he closed them tightly, trying to stop the stinging.

Then there was a thrum, like the sound of great wings. He tried to open his eyes again, and what he saw... a man. It was like looking in a mirror - white hair, lyrium blue eyes. But the hair was far longer than his and he wore the armored uniform of a templar knight. He was held in the air by great white wings. An... angel? And he was reaching out to Kayden. He had seen this man before, but he couldn't remember where.

Kayden shook his head. He must have seeing things, he told himself. As he closed his eyes again, just as he was lifted from the ground by something clamped tightly around his torso.


	3. Chapter 2: Of Bandits and Blight

Author's Note: Hey everyone! This chapter took a little longer than expected, partially because it was rewritten twice. Sorry!

Thanks so much to ShebasDawn for her lovely beta work! 3

* * *

**Chapter 2: Of Bandits and Blight**

Total bitch. That's what Alistair had called her. Sure, some of the things Morrigan said - especially to Alistair - could be considered a bit on the mean side, but Kayden found that she was rather practical. He liked her. She didn't, however, agree with all the things he did while they were in Lothering.

After entering the Dane's Refuge, the first thing Kayden had done, after beating up some of Loghain's men, and then using them to send a message to Loghain, was invite a Chantry sister to their little group. The redhead had introduced herself as Leliana and claimed she had been a minstrel from Orlais. She had come to the Chantry in Lothering only two years previously.

That's when all the fun started.

Kayden began helping random people around the small, doomed village. Mostly in menial tasks, and when they didn't seem to need much more, he moved to the Chantry board. That was something Morrigan seemed to be the most against. He told her it was for the money, but they all knew what his real intent was. Kayden wanted to prove to people that he wasn't a wandering ghost.

He even rescued a caged Qunari from darkspawn. Well, he got the Revered Mother to give them the key to the cage anyway. The darkspawn weren't likely to overrun the town for a few more days yet, but he felt a sense of accomplishment at persuading her to release the ashen warrior into his custody to help in his quest against the Blight. Leliana loved telling him that it was more her doing than his, but if she hadn't been there, Kayden would have likely threatened the priest into handing the key over anyway. Still, it was a good thing Leliana had been there.

That had only been their first day in Lothering. Between tricking some bandits into giving the Grey Wardens a donation and running off some of Loghain's men, the flimsy sword Kayden had found on the road had broken. In three pieces no less. There was a blacksmith at Lothering, but none of his wares were much better than the other sword had been when he found it.

"You are a terrible swordsman you know," Leliana said to him the first night as they sat around the fire.

"Flattery won't get you anywhere, my dear." Kayden snorted.

"Of course not, but you really are awful. I'd like to help you."

Kayden raised an eyebrow and turned his head to look at her. "How? I've already asked Alistair to teach me to use a sword."

"Which I'm wondering if I should have agreed to, by the way." Alistair sat down next to Kayden by the fire, and leaned back, trying to relax.

"You're having second thoughts then?" he asked softly.

"Well first of all, you're clumsy, your stance is off, and your footwork is terrible."

"That's all?" Kayden asked, raising an eyebrow and biting back sarcasm. No one had ever really criticized him like that before, not even in the Tower.

"I said 'first of all'. I don't even want to get started on the rest. Do you really think a mage could learn my style of fighting?"

"Yes, I do. It will take practice, but I think I can do it."

"Well, at least you don't lack determination," Alistair sighed and lowered his voice.

Kayden grinned, "We're stating tomorrow then, right?"

"First," Leliana cut in, "you need some balance training. You heard Alistair, you're clumsy."

"What?" Kayden let out an exasperated sigh.

"Yes, balance training. As clumsy as you are, I fear you will injure yourself training. Any injury you get would likely be your own fault and I don't want you blaming Alistair for it. Now here is what I suggest, Alistair; I will help Kade with balance training before he goes with you for sword training. Let's say, 15 minutes every day then?"

"Sounds good to me," Alistair laughed.

Kayden gave them a frustrated nod. There was no winning against these two. "I guess there will be no harm in that."

"It is settled then. Hm, I'm going to need to break out my leathers for this. I wonder if they will still fit properly."

"If you'll excuse me then," Kayden said as he stood up and left the fire. He walked around Lothering for a bit, just to be away. Everything was happening so fast. Only two days ago he had become a full-time mage at the Circle and now he was at a town full of doomed refugees.

With the inn full, there were so many people camped about the town in little tents. Some were shivering by tiny fires, much like the one he and his companions made. He wondered how many of these people hadn't had a thing to eat today. He couldn't help everyone, he told himself. If he gave up all his money, he and his little party would starve too. Did that make him a bad person?

Suffering, everywhere he looked. What was worse, as soon as people saw him, they ushered their children away. Kayden had been able to approach some of them during the day and offer them help, but at night...

"It's a ghost! Quickly children, get in your tent. Recite the Chant!"

Kayden kicked a rock. Ingrates. Why should he help people like that? They didn't want his help. They would cast him aside like an abomination. Alistair, Morrigan, and Leliana didn't treat him the same way. They didn't seem to care what he looked like. What made them so different?

"Walking about the miserable, I see?"

"Morrigan."

"So nice of you to remember my name."

Kayden turned around and met the witch's gaze, "How could I not? You and Flemeth have done a great deal for me. I will not forget your kindness."

"You act like I had a choice, but you are welcome all the same," she smiled now and motioned for him to join her by her little fire. They sat there in silence for a few minutes before she finally asked, "Do you know anything about herbalism?"

He looked at her for a moment, wondering why she'd want to know that, but he answered, "I took a basic class in herbalism back at the Tower."

"Good," she said, handing him a flask, "Will you help me make some poultices then?"

Kayden nodded and set to work. She had enough ingredients to make a good amount of them, and he wondered if they would need to use the all. He hoped they wouldn't.

The silence was thick and awkward. What could he say to her? She was a mage, but she never lived at the Tower, she was raised in the Wilds. There was so much he wanted to ask, wanted to know, but he didn't want to insult her by asking so many invasive questions. She seemed to be the type of person that highly valued her privacy.

He looked at her from the corner of his eyes, her gaze cast down upon her project. Her eyes seemed so mysterious to him just the other day, but now... they seemed lonely. Suddenly, he felt like he understood her very well, thinking about his life at the tower. The nicknames the other apprentices had given him, how far away they sat from him when they ate in the Great Hall or when they were studying in the Library.

Spook had been a popular one for a long time. Go away, Spook. Kayden recalled them saying that a lot during that phase.

"Where are you from? You must not have been at the Tower your whole life."

Kayden blinked and looked up, he hadn't expected her to be the one to initiate a conversation. If he was right though, she probably welcomed his company.

"I'm from Kirkwall in the Free Marches."

"Not even from Ferelden then. Shame. Must be very different there."

"Different? I suppose so, but I haven't been there in ten years. I can't remember very well. As far as Ferelden goes, this is the first time since then that I've even left the Tower, so I've yet to make a decision on that."

Morrigan looked up the poultice she was working on, "You've never left the tower?"

Kayden shook his head. "Apprentices weren't permitted to go outside."

"That would explain why you're so pale then," she smirked.

"I've been like this since I was born. I remember my mother once saying I took after my father."

"Your father? What is he like?"

"I don't know. I never met him."

"Oh... and your mother?"

"I loved her. She was very kind."

"I'm sorry, I can't help but be just a bit jealous."

"Of my relationship with my mother? I haven't seen her in ten years. I don't even know if she still lives. But you, your mother is still with you. What reason do you have to feel jealous? Flemeth is your mother, yes?"

"Are you asking if she gave birth to me? I am not certain, but she is the one who raised me."

They talked for a while. She told him stories about growing up in the Wilds, about what Flemeth told of her past. The stories he had read about Flemeth had all been lies and exaggeration. In return, he told her a little about his life at the Tower. Eventually, she stopped him.

"We should get some rest now. No doubt the dimwit and the silly redhead will want you up early tomorrow for that training you told me about."

Kayden nodded, "You're right. I... had a good time tonight. We should talk more another time."

"Yes, that would be nice. And... thank you for your help with the poultices. I think we have plenty for now."

Their gazes met for a brief second before they said good night. Kayden smiled, he hadn't felt like this since he met Jowan and Alim. At least he got along with one of his companions. Maybe he'd eventually begin to consider her a friend, and he hoped she would feel the same way.

o O o

Kayden was checking the Chanter's Board early the next day, stretching the stiffness out of his back as he looked over the listed jobs. It seemed there were more bandits running amok just outside the town.

He pulled the paper off the board and read it over a few times. This was just what he needed to really practice the skills Leliana and Alistair were teaching him, and he decided he would show them the paper after they trained together.

Leliana not only had him balance training, but also doing pushups, sit-ups and many other exercises. She said that this would help him with balance and stability, and reduce the risk of injury when he practiced with Alistair. She also added that building muscle couldn't hurt. He was insulted, but didn't argue.

"I'll make a man out of you yet," she said with a grin as Kayden joined Alistair. She sat on a nearby bench to watch.

Originally, Kayden had thought the fact that Alistair fought with a sword and shield wouldn't be a problem. Just a minor detail, right? Wrong. As the two continued to spar, Alistair's shield made teaching incredibly difficult. He tried discarding it while he taught Kayden, but it proved to be rather awkward for him. Still they pressed on.

"All right, let's take a break." Alistair let our a frustrated sigh as he took a long drink of water from a metal cup.

Leliana was in a fit of giggles by now, practically falling off the long bench she had been watching them on.

"It's not that funny," Kayden huffed as he joined Alistair and Leliana. He decided now would be a good time to show them the paper he took from the Chanter's Board.

"So, you wanna run off some bandits today then? That's fine by me, but you're not going alone," Alistair said after he looked over the paper. He handed it back to Kayden who folded it up and slipped it into the pouch with his Spellbook. That was really the only good place for it anyway.

"I was hoping I wouldn't have to go alone anyway. I need the practice, but I'm not good enough to fight off a group of bandits on my own without resorting to magic. Though I'd likely run out of mana depending on how many of them there are."

"Well I'm glad you realize that. I like your head where it is," Leliana added.

He decided he liked her better in her leather armor rather than the chantry robes. Chantry robes just reminded him of Lily now. He cringed at the thought, the way she reacted finding out Jowan was a Blood Mage. She said she had been in love with Jowan. He stifled bitter laugh. He didn't want the others to think he was crazy.

"Should we ask Sten and Morrigan to come with us?" Leliana asked, snapping Kayden out of his thoughts.

"Do we really need Morrigan? Or the giant? I don't really trust either of them," Alistair asked.

Kayden glanced over toward Alistair, "It would be nice to have an extra sword, and magic is always good... We don't really know how many bandits we will be facing."

"Actually, nevermind that. Maybe just the three of us and your dog should go," Leliana suggested. "We'll attract less attention with smaller numbers, we may even be able to sneak right up to them."

"Not that you'll be 'sneaking right up to them'. You seem to fancy that bow," Kayden laughed.

"I have daggers if I need to use them," she grinned, but she didn't say where. It hadn't occurred to Kayden that she would have hidden weapons. What was it she learned in Orlais?

Leliana led the way through the gates and out into the field. They stayed west of the windmill, making their way north toward the bridge.

"I see one of them," she said, nocking an arrow, "Are you ready?"

Kayden nodded and she shot. The arrow flew true and hit the bandit between the eyes.

"Leliana! Couldn't you have shot him through the leg or something?"

His loud comment got the attention of a few more bandits standing nearby. Kayden cursed as the group rushed towards them.

Leliana quickly nocked another arrow as the men were closing in. Another fell and soon Alistair was crashing blades with one of them. Volfson, Kayden's dog, rushed forward to fight against the two bandit hounds.

Kayden sighed and pulled out the unfamiliar weapon he had been training with. He needed to start using it, but was so tempted to start hurling magic at the bandits. He refrained.

They were obviously more skilled than the mage, but they soon all lay dead around them. He had seen dead men before, mostly at Ostagar during the battle, but this was something different. He had been the one to deliver the deathblow to at least one of these men.

He collapsed to his hands and knees and lost his breakfast in the grass.

He felt Leliana's small hand pat him on the back. "First time then? Don't worry, if we hadn't killed them, they would have killed us."

"Easy for you to say. How many have you killed?"

"I lost count."

"I hate to say this, but you might have to get over that fast. This isn't likely to be the last time you kill someone," Alistair said, softly, petting Volfson. The dog was worriedly licking his master's shoulder now.

While they were probably right, that didn't make things any better. It certainly wouldn't stop him from feeling bad about it. He threw up again just thinking about it.

Leliana lightly rubbed his shoulder. She was very patient, letting him get it all out. He was half surprised Alistair didn't comment anymore about it. It was better that way anyway.

"Somehow, I didn't see it going like this when I read the job on the board. I'll be fine, just give me a few more minutes."

o O o

The Chantry had later rewarded him with a sword for helping with all the bandits. It was way better than the junk he had been carrying around before. Kayden sold his other sword and sheathed the new one at his side. Oathkeeper, they had called it. It was the perfect reward for him he thought, looking over the Warden's pendant held on a chain around his neck. He'd use this sword for a good while yet.

Alistair and Leliana continued helping him train the next few days, and he continued to help the refugees in Lothering until they decided it was time to leave. By the fifth day, most of the stragglers were gone from the doomed town. They packed up their things and saw out a few more refugees.

Alistair guessed that it was likely this time tomorrow the place would be swarming with darkspawn, and Kayden was not ready to face that many with his limited amount of training. Very limited, Alistair had added. They had only been in Lothering for five days after all.

Morrigan seemed to be grateful to be getting away. She disapproved of them running around on errands the entire time they were there. That had at least been what she said, but Kayden thought she simply didn't like being around so many people. It must have made her nervous. He understood, of course, because he felt the same way in a crowd. However, he couldn't stand by and watch when so many people needed help.

After rescuing a dwarven merchant and his son from a group of darkspawn, they were on the road again, heading north-west toward Redcliffe. Alistair told them it would take a little more than a day to get there. Maybe they should have left Lothering sooner. It was too late now though, they had stayed and helped everyone they could.

And then they came across a traveling woman. She seemed hysterical, babbling about her little caravan being attacked.

They picked up the pace, following her back toward where she said her caravan was. There didn't seem to be much left. The fight seemed to be already over when they got there. She stopped next to a man.

Kayden could not see the woman's face, but she seemed to be talking to the man. He then looked away from the woman, his gaze settling on Kayden. They briefly locked eyes and a wicked grin appeared on his face.

"The Warden dies here!"


	4. Chapter 3: Ode to the Dead

**Chapter 3: Ode to the Dead**

He was only barely able to block the dagger that came flying at him, Oathkeeper ringing as steel met steel. The others were fighting off the ambush around him, Leliana working to dispatch the archers perched atop the small cliffs overlooking the road, Morrigan targeting the mage, and Alistair and Sten engaging the armored men that had appeared from behind the destroyed wagons.

This left Kayden with the elf fighter that seemed to be their leader. He still had that wicked smirk on his face, as if he knew how this little battle of theirs would end. His friends might have been doing well with the rest, but Kayden was by far outmatched and he knew it.

He blocked again, a feint. He realized it a bit too late as the other blade made contact with his flesh, leaving a deep gash in his right arm. He barely noticed it at first, but a few seconds later it began sending jolts of pain throughout his arm. He cried out and his head swam. The blade had been poisoned.

The elf laughed and attacked again, this time cutting into his other arm. Kayden tried to step away, but the world seemed so far away now. The affects of the poison were already taking its toll on him.

"Kayden! Stop being a stubborn ass and fight! Focus!" It was Morrigan's voice. Or was it? It was a woman's voice, but it couldn't have been Leliana. She was right. He had been trying so hard to work on his swordsmanship that he pushed aside the possibility of using magic at all.

The world seemed to halt around him as he closed his eyes. So slow. Everything was so slow. He reached deep, concentrating, and when his eyes opened, everything went back to their normal pace. He would most certainly collapse later, but he needed all the help he could get now. He chanted the spell under his breath and then let it go. It hit all the foes around him, stopping them in their paths. Alistair and Sten took the opportunity to cut the helpless enemies down, and gave Kayden a chance to attack the stunned elf.

This was his chance. Kayden held his arms up in front of him and a swirl of white appeared and spread over his hands and forearms, then into the air before him, engulfing the elf and encasing him in frost. Sten took down the last of the armored men, and now the frozen elf was all that was left of the ambushers. The battle was over.

"You damn fool!" Morrigan yelled, striding over face the white-haired mage. "That little stunt you pulled could have gotten all of us killed! Remember first and foremost, you are a MAGE. You are not a swordsman, your skill is barely on the level of a squire boy tending to his master's horse!"

Alistair sighed, "I hate to say this, but I agree with Morrigan. There's nothing wrong with wanting to learn to fight with a sword, but survival is more important. You are a Grey Warden now, and we must do what needs to be done to stop the Blight. You can't leave me to do it all by myself after all."

"That fool over there certainly couldn't stop the Blight on his own. Tis better for him to be dead than you," Morrigan added.

"Hey!"

"Now is not the time for that. The elf is still alive. What do you plan on doing with him?" Leliana asked, finally joining them after checking the dead men for useful items.

Alistair nodded, "Yes, this was no mere bandit raid. These men were better trained."

"Assassins, yes." Leliana added.

"We question him then," Kayden suggested, the world starting to get fuzzy again as he felt his concentration slipping once more, "and make it quick."

"I have some rope, I'll be ready to tie him up as soon as the ice melts." Leliana rummaged through her pack, pulling out a few feet of thick hemp rope. She knew it wouldn't take long for the spell to wear off so she'd have to act quickly. Alistair joined her just in case.

"Morrigan." Kayden started.

"Kayden." She snapped back at him, the glare still in her eyes.

"I think he... poisoned me."

"I can tell. I'll take care of it as soon as we're done here."

"Thanks..."

Her gaze softened, and she seemed to want to add something else, but decided against it. Was she actually worried? "You are welcome."

"Wake him up," he heard Alistair say. Kayden looked away from Morrigan. The spell had worn off and Leliana had tied him up already. The elf was out cold, and with a loud thump, he hit the ground as soon as the ice melted off his legs and feet. Leliana didn't even need to do anything, because when he hit the ground, he jolted awake.

"I... rather thought I would wake up dead, or not at all as the case may be. I see you haven't killed me yet."

Kayden raised an eyebrow. "Well, I could rectify that. However I have some questions for you before I make that decision."

"Ah, so I am to be interrogated then? Let me save you some time. My name is Zevran, Zev to my friends."

That was almost too easy, Kayden thought as the elf told him about the Antivan Crows and how he was hired by Loghain to kill the surviving Grey Wardens. Something didn't seem quite right about this. Why would he just tell them everything without even just a little bit of resistance?

"And how do I know you're telling the truth, I wonder?"

Zevran laughed, "Well I wasn't paid to keep silent!"

The laugh didn't seem forced. In fact, it actually seemed genuine. Kayden looked over the man for a moment, not entirely sure what to say next. He hadn't really gotten much of a chance to look at him while they were fighting but now... He was gorgeous, everything about him. Kayden had to force himself to look away, something that would be quite rude under normal circumstances, but with a man tied up at his feet he didn't see how it mattered.

Kayden sighed and finally looked back. "So this means you are not loyal to Loghain then?"

"Loyalty? Now that is an interesting concept. If you wish, and you are done interrogating and staring at me, not that I mind, perhaps we can talk about it further."

Leliana giggled behind Kayden, and he felt his cheeks grow hot. Of course the elf would notice. Sly bastard.

Zevran must have been planning something, but against his better judgment, Kayden helped him up and untied him. The elf gave him a proposition; his life was forfeit and the Crows would likely kill him eventually for failing is mission, so instead, he asked to join Kayden and his group. Right now, Kayden was in no position to turn down any help offered. He needed to stop the Blight and Loghain, and if the assassin really meant to help he could prove rather useful.

He was finding it hard to concentrate again but managed to get out, "I agree." Much to Alistair's dismay.

"Morrigan... did I mention... that I'm not... feeling so good?" He somehow got it all out before he finally collapsed.

o O o

_Kayden's eyes went wide when he saw the boat that would be taking them across the Waking Sea to Amaranthine. It was a rather small boat, the nicer templar told him, but to a nine year-old it was a giant floating in the green water. The excited boy would have ran ahead of the templars onto the boat if the other templar hadn't stopped him. He stared at the man's helm for a moment, and returned to the nice templar's side. By this point, he had dubbed them Nice Templar and Mean Templar._

_Kayden didn't like the little cabin he was supposed to share with the templars, much preferring the deck. He enjoyed looking out over the sea, smelling the salty air and feeling the ocean spray on his face. When someone wasn't around to shoo him away, it was calm and relaxing and he tried his best to spend most of his time there, legs dangling over the side and looking at the horizon in the distance._

_Halfway through the first week, Nice Templar gave him a book to read, _The Legend of Calenhad. _When he wasn't reading, Nice Templar told him stories of the Witches of the Wilds, the Dalish Elves, the Orlesian bards, and the ghosts that haunted West Hill, a fortress port in Ferelden just south of Kirkwall. Kayden was entranced by these stories, giving the templar his full wide-eyed and excited attention. The stories were almost as good as the ones his mother used to tell him._

_The voyage took nearly two weeks, and by the time they arrived in the city of Amaranthine, the entire crew knew Kayden by name. Most of them treated him cautiously, even fearfully, shooing him away on site. They believed he was a bad omen and they prayed constantly that they wouldn't be caught in a huge storm just by the boy's presence._

_From Amaranthine they rode on horseback, Kayden with Nice Templar while Mean Templar followed behind them. They stopped often in small towns along the way. Nice Templar continued to tell him stories while Mean Templar barely spoke to him. When he did, it had been the mean-spirited remark of a man who clearly hated mages. This was something Kayden had begun to think was normal among templar, even though Nice Templar was different. He was gentle and kind, not at all like any of the others he had met._

_"I'm sure any day now the Viscount will be swarming the Gallows, if he hasn't already. Good thing we're not there." Nice Templar had been speaking to Kayden in a soft tone, but all he could do was nod in response. If Mean Templar could hear them, he never responded._

_After a while, Kayden finally spoke. "You're protecting me then? Why?"_

_The man chuckled a bit and ran a hand through the boy's hair, "If I didn't, I think I'd regret it every day for the rest of my life."_

_This only made the 9 year-old more confused. He stiffed up a bit and pouted, but turned his gaze forward, watching the scenery pass by. This was his first ride on a horse after all._

_After a while he couldn't take the silence anymore. The hooves meeting road weren't nearly enough for him. "What is happening in Kirkwall then? Will I ever go back?"_

_"That is a lot to tell, but I believe the Grand Cleric in Orlais has something to do with it. No need to worry yourself about such things. And no, I don't suspect you will be going back. Not any time soon at least. You will be studying in the Ferelden Circle for a while yet."_

_And then he saw the Tower growing in the distance, larger with each step they took. It was a tall, dark figure amidst the grey skies. It loomed over the land like a ghost, a creature of death ready to call the souls back to the Dreams. This was to be his home, his prison, and he realized seeing the grand spire that it still wasn't nearly as terrifying as the Gallows on the outside. This building looked dark and cold, while the Gallows had screamed of pain, death, and suffering._

_When they finally reached the docks, they met by a kindly older man who was to ferry them across the lake to the island in the center. The island was where the Tower sat, hovering over them now. He looked up and up and up into the sky. The dark needle of the spire blotting out the sun and the thick shadow it cast loomed over them. He gulped and held tightly to Nice Templar._

_The ride wasn't long, maybe fifteen minutes before they reached the other side. Nice Templar helped him out, as Mean Templar simply watched. They ushered him through grand doors into the Tower's entrance hall._

_Another templar was there waiting for them. He must have known about their arrival beforehand. He didn't wear the helm of the templar so Kayden could see that his short dark hair and well-trimmed beard were starting to grey with age. He took an instant dislike to this man. Nice Templar stopped to talk to him, but Kayden was pushed to continue toward another set of doors without even a chance to say goodbye._

_"Ah, and there you are Templar -"_

_Kayden cursed himself for not being able to hear the man's name, as quickly as he was being rushed away, but he looked back and he saw the templar take off his helm. Blue eyes met his, deep blue, the color of lyrium and long hair, white as snow, just like his. He knew he would regret not asking the man about himself._

_The templar smiled._

_Then he heard whispering. Someone was calling to him. The hall around him began to grow dark as if someone were snuffing out all the lights. When he looked back, the templar was gone, and in his place darkspawn. The room was gone, and the light with it, but he saw the darkspawn still, and up on a high rocky cliff the dragon. He was compelled to go to it, its very presence tugging at his legs._

_He felt weak as he was forced forward. The dragon turned its gaze to him and all the darkspawn stopped. They saw him and he couldn't run away, he could only move closer, ever closer. But they didn't attack. They seemed to be welcoming him instead. In fact, they seemed to be urging him closer to the dragon._

_Kayden tried to scream, but no sound came out. He couldn't halt his steps._

_The dragon roared._

**o O o**

Kayden shot up, blankets falling to his waist. He was shaking and covered in sweat. The dragon had appeared to him again, or he had appeared to it. He wasn't sure. Did the darkspawn know where he was? Did he even know where he was?

He looked around. He was in a tent, no shirt on, his arms bandaged. Alive at least, he thought. Then he remembered. They had been ambushed on their way to Redcliffe. He had been poisoned. Had Morrigan treated his wounds and the poison? Most likely. This was the second time she had patched him up. He'd never hear the end of this.

What was worse... he passed out in front of the assassin. The terribly sexy assassin. Kayden cursed himself. "I hate my life."

He pulled the covers back up over his face. He didn't want to leave the tent. How could he let them see him now? He wished he could just die of embarrassment. That would be more merciful than having to meet all their faces again after that. How could he have been so stupid? If he had gone into that fight using his magic right away the elf never would have touched him, but he had had something to prove. He wanted to get better, he didn't want the others to think he was some silly weak mage dependent completely on his magic. After all, being a mage had brought him nothing but pain his entire life.

But Morrigan was right, he was stubborn. Too stubborn. If things had gone wrong and he had refused to fall back on magic they really could have all died back there; he could have died. Too much was at stake for that with the Blight and civil war likely creeping up on the Ferelden people. He really did have to let his duty as a Grey Warden come first.

Kayden's head fell into his hands. How could he do that? How could he, who had only just taken his Harrowing, stop the Blight? He had only just become a Warden, and already so much rode on his shoulders, it was almost too much to bear. He had never asked for this.

There was no going back now.

Kayden pushed the blankets aside, and stepped out of the tent, not bothering to put his robes on over his trousers.

Alistair sat by the fire, a piece of wood in one hand and a knife in the other.

"Bad dreams?" he asked, setting the items aside.

Kayden nodded and sat down next to his friend and gestured with his head towards the bandages, "Morrigan?"

"Yeah, she was the one to bandage you up after we forced the assassin to give us an antidote."

"What did you do with him?"

"He's fine. He's in his tent, minding his own business. Or so I'd hope after the stern talk he got."

"Stern talk?"

"Don't worry about it. We trust you, no one hurt him if that's what you're thinking."

Kayden nodded again, "These dreams. I saw a dragon. It seemed so real."

"Well it is real, sort of. All Wardens get those dreams. Some learn to live with them, sometimes they fade away after a while. You'll get used to it." Alistair picked up the wood and knife again and went back to carving.

"Is that the archdemon?"

"Maybe. This is how we know it's a real Blight. Kade, you really need to get some more sleep. We are planning to leave at sun up. We'll likely reach Redcliffe by noon if all goes well."

"Yeah, okay. I'll do that then." He looked back toward his tent, then to Alistair again, "Thanks for talking to me."

"That's what I'm here for. Giving people bad news." And then under his breath, "Maker knows there's more of that to come."

Kayden pretended not to hear. He really did need the sleep and he could always ask Alistair what he meant later. He opened the flap on his tent and slid in again, laying back against his bedroll and staring at the cloth above him. His arms were throbbing, but he forced himself to relax, breathing slow and deep. Soon he drifted off once more.

o O o

"Okay, so let me get this straight. You want me to get a drunk that locked himself into the smithy to repair all the armor, ask the knights if they need anything, and try to persuade a stubborn dwarf to come out and fight? Why do I get the feeling I've just become an errand boy?" Kayden asked, firmly planting his face in his palm.

"You did not complain about that in Lothering, Kayden," Morrigan reminded him. She sounded just as annoyed as he did, however.

"This is pointless. There are no darkspawn here." Sten finally spoke.

"Usually, I'd agree with you, Sten, but we need to get to the castle and seek the aid of the arl."

"Why do we need him?"

"He has knights. We need an army..."

Kayden really hated having to explain himself.

"Not to mention we need him to help us stop Loghain. When he hears about what Loghain did at Ostagar-"

"Alistair! I know, you go talk to the knights! Do they know you too? Or is it just Teagan that knows you?"

"Some of them might remember me."

"Good, you go talk to the knights. Don't forget to mention the barrels of oil to them. Maybe they'll be useful tonight."

"Don't forget, Owen is most important. We need all our armor repaired," came Murdock's grisly voice.

"I'll talk to him first then. Leliana, Morrigan, will you go find Kaitlyn's younger brother?"

"So you are to send me to do something meaningless then?" Morrigan protested, "And you plan to take the elf with you?"

"Sten's coming with me too."

"I'm here you know. I can hear you," Zevran said. The witch just glared at him.

Kayden hadn't even thought of where to send Zevran, but he couldn't send the assassin off on his own. He didn't trust the man, none of them did. He'd have to stay with Kayden and Sten for now.

"Just... go find him, Morrigan."

Morrigan sighed, "Fine, fine. I'll do it, but you owe me."

"I owe you for more than just that."

"Ha! Well, I should have to open a tab for you then. By the time you've stopped the Blight, you will owe me your firstborn." Morrigan joked.

Kayden shuddered, "I should hope not!"

"Right. Now make yourself useful, Tower-Boy, and do keep yourself in one piece, no secret poisons this time."

"Just go!"

The women laughed as they walked away and Kayden turned to Sten and Zevran, "Maker, when did I become a teasing magnet?"

"Probably when you started carrying a sword," Sten offered. "It is your own fault. You are a mage, why change that?"

Kayden threw his arms into the air, "I give up. Alright let's go see the blacksmith."

Owen was drunk, the door to the smithy locked. Though it didn't take long to persuade him to unlock the door and let them in, it was clear it would take a bit more to get him to work. His daughter, the Arlessa's maid, was stuck in the castle while the dead were terrorizing the town. He didn't know if she was alive, but he refused to help the town without a promise from Kayden that he would look for her while he was in Redcliffe Castle. He was already tired of the blacksmith, and there were other things he needed to do. He made the promise.

"Is that a promise you plan to keep?" Sten asked.

"What was that?" Owen looked at the Qunari.

"I said nothing to you, human!"

"Right, well, I have your word, Warden?"

Kayden nodded, "Yes, I will look for her."

"Alright, I'll get to work then."

They left the blacksmith's house, Kayden rubbing his temples, "When we're done at Dwyn's, let's go to the tavern then."

"Ah, planning on getting drunk before the battle tonight? Good plan!" The elf teased.

"No, but a drink would be nice, don't you agree?"

"Yes, yes I do. A drink would be marvelous right about now. I hope there will be women there too."

Kayden rolled his eyes, "Pah, women. And here I thought we sent them away."

"Do I sense sarcasm, my friend?"

"Oh no, not at all," he deadpanned, scratching the back of his head.

They found the dwarf's small house. Kayden knocked, but there was no answer. The door was locked, hopelessly jammed. With the impending battle that night, he figured the man probably locked himself in there and wasn't planning to come out until everything was over.

"Coward..." He said, "I'm kicking the door down. Any objections?"

Sten shook his head and Zevran said, "None from me."

"Good." Kayden grinned and turned back to the door. He'd always wanted to do this, now was a good time as any to let out a little steam. With a Qunari and an assassin watching him, he decided he didn't want to look stupid if he tried kicking it down and it did not work. He expected he would fail. So he decided to cheat, it was unlikely that they'd notice anyway.

Kayden focused for brief second, then brought up his leg, and slammed it into the door, pushing just enough magic into it to break the lock. The door swung open. He grinned. It wasn't too flashy, hopefully believable enough for them not to notice.

"Hey! What in the... Why did you break into my house?" Came the angry response inside. Kayden looked in, seeing the dwarf flanked by two men. Bodyguards he guessed. He might have looked the same way with a giant and an assassin at his side.

The Qunari ducked through the door and pointed to the other side of the room, "That is my sword."

Kayden glared at the dwarf, "Where did you get that?"

"Not that it's any of your business, but I bought it," The dwarf answered, but when he looked at the Qunari he added, "But the man never told me he took it off a live giant. Look, I spent a lot of money on it..."

"I have a better idea," Kayden started, "Your life or the sword. Pick."

"I like living, so just take the sword and get out."

The Qunari went to the other side of the room and took the sword. It was like watching a reunion. That sword was more than just a weapon to him.

"If you don't need anything else, please just leave," the dwarf said again when he noticed Kayden wasn't budging.

"There is one more matter. The battle tonight."

"Oh no, I'm staying in here, there ain't nothin' getting me out of this house tonight. Now just leave so I can bolt the door back again..." He looked at the door. It was barely on the hinges anymore as it was. It would take some work to get it back into place.

"I shouldn't be surprised by this," Kayden started, "Everyone always has to be a right pain in the ass when I'm having a bad day. The lot of you realize I'm a mage, right?" He really hated having to resort to something like that. He gritted his teeth a bit, and then one of Dwyn's men spoke up.

"I don't want to be turned into a toad, boss." It was a whisper, barely audible. He obviously hadn't wanted Kayden to hear him.

Kayden narrowed an eyebrow, "Look at me! No really, look at me. Good, becoming a toad would be the least of your worries. Oh no, I'd do worse, FAR worse. Now get out before I break more than your damn door."

"I'm going. You can tell Murdock he won," the defeated dwarf said, slinking out of his tiny house.

When he was gone, Zevran turned to look at him, "My my aren't you violent. Would you really have killed him?"

"I was prepared to." Kayden snorted.

Sten made a sound, though Kayden wasn't sure what sort of sound it was meant to be, "I heard about your first kill."

Kayden cringed, "Let's not talk about that, shall we?" Certainly not in front of Zevran, he thought. The elf, of course, was amused by the turn of events and pressed Sten for details. He was refused of course. Good thing Sten wasn't really the talkative type. Word really did travel fast in their little group though, and he was sure Leliana would end up telling Zevran eventually anyway. He, however, did not plan on being around when she did.

o O o

The undead were just as expected, mindless bodies of decaying flesh, practically falling apart at most joints, and they came at their small force in waves. Because of the barrels of oil however, things were a little more interesting than that; they came in waves of _ burning_, decaying flesh. They weren't particularly strong. The main problem was just how many of them there were. They just kept coming!

A song rose up over the village. A song of sorrow, war, and victory. Leliana's voice carried the men and they fought for their home.

When Kayden finally thought they were done, someone came from the town below saying more undead were coming from the lake. Great, just what they needed.

Kayden, Sten, Alistair and Zevran made their way toward the Chantry to join the other group of men, including the fat bartender that Kayden had persuaded to come out and fight. He had been another coward planning to lock himself in the tavern's cellar that night. Nice to see he was pulling his weight, quite literally.

This time, however, they didn't have fire to aid them in killing these and Kayden found out quickly that his ice spells didn't have much of an affect on them unless he could completely freeze them in place. Doing that, however, would risk injury to the other men around him. Kayden had to rely almost completely on his sword. Though this time, it was different. After breaking down the door earlier, he realized he could put some magic into his movement. He hit faster and harder, but that was the extent of what he could do for the moment. It wasn't a huge improvement but it certainly helped.

His goal that night had been to impress the assassin, but with the undead pretty much being pushovers, he hardly thought he stood out at all. It wasn't really a bad thing though, because when the sun began coming up and the undead stopped coming, he saw the toll they took on the village. A few wounded, but none dead. It all had gone rather well really.

Alistair patted his back later, "Much better. What did you do?"

Kayden grinned, "I cheated."

Alistair raised an eyebrow and laughed. "You should have been doing that from the beginning you know. Well that makes things easier on me, but not on you. Training's going to get harder from now on."

"What are you going to do? Use your Templar powers to keep me from using my magic for physical combat?"

"Nope, you keep doing that. Maker knows it can only help. I'm just going to stop holding back. We're probably going to need to put you in armor though. If you plan on being in the middle of a fight, those robes of yours aren't going to help at all."

"You're right. I guess I could benefit from a decent set of armor."

This felt good. Alistair had not been the person he set out to impress, but Alistair was his trainer after all, and impressing his trainer was always a good thing, no? He cleaned off his blade as Bann Teagan stepped up to the porch outside the Chantry and addressed the villagers, proclaiming their victory.


	5. Chapter 4: Bound in Blood Part I

**Chapter 4: Bound in Blood Part I**

"Say that again, Templar!" Kayden yelled, bringing himself to his feet.

Alistair took a step back, a confused look on his face. "Blood magic is evil, why are you defending this man?"

"He is NOT evil. This is my best friend, I've known him since we were children. Look what _they_ did to him."

Kayden looked back at his friend, covered in blood and bruises, and he was sure Jowan's arm might have been broken. Jowan told him that after he ran away from the Tower, he was hired by Loghain to poison the Arl and he came to Redcliffe under the guise of a tutor teaching the Arl's son in magic. This was meant to be secret of course. Isolde, the Arl's wife, did not want their son to be sent to the Circle.

Jowan had surely been in the wrong place at the wrong time, but what happened at Redcliffe, other than a poisoned arl, was not his fault. From the sound of it, the boy let the demon in due to his inexperience. He wasn't prepared to enter the Fade. Morrigan agreed.

"Stay still, I'm going to try to heal you." Kayden knelt over his friend again. He wasn't a skilled healer, but he'd do his best. If Alim were here, Jowan's broken arm would be mended by now. Even with Kayden's treatment, Jowan looked better at least. He'd have to get Jowan proper medical care when he could.

"I need to do something," Jowan started, "I can't keep running away. I have to help them. It's my fault..."

"It's not your fault. You didn't know the boy would do this." Kayden extended his hand to his friend and added, "You should know by now all mages attract demons. Can you stand?"

Jowan nodded. "I can try. You're really not very good at healing, are you? You should have paid more attention in class." He took Kayden's hand. It took some effort, but he finally got Jowan on his feet.

"We're not taking the Blood Mage with us," Alistair said, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Are you serious? We took in Sten even though he killed a whole family, children included, so he could 'atone'. Jowan hasn't killed anyone... yet."

"But he's a blood mage. For all we know, he could be under mind control right now."

Kayden shook his head. "He's not that strong. Not yet at least. No offense, Jowan."

"None taken."

"Plus, he wants to help. If he thinks he can help put things right again, that's commendable, don't you agree?"

"I for one, think he deserves a second chance," Zevran agreed. Kayden looked at the elf. He had been unusually silent ever since they entered the castle. Normally, the group couldn't get him to shut up.

Alistair sighed in resignation and relaxed a bit, letting his arms drop to his sides. "Three mages and an assassin against an ex-templar. How ironic things would turn out like this."

"You know Alistair, of the two remaining Wardens, are you not the senior? Is it normal that you allow your junior to lead?" Morrigan asked, the amused look of a Cheshire cat on her face.

Alistair gave her a sidelong glance. "What do you want to hear?"

"You know, I never asked to lead either. If you have input, Alistair, you really should speak up," Kayden offered.

"What? Lead? Me? No, no, no. No leading. Bad things happen when I lead. We get lost, people die, and the next thing you know I'm stranded somewhere without any pants!"

Zevran seemed to perk up after hearing that. "This I'd like to see."

"They answer is no. Now please, can we just continue?"

Morrigan and Kayden laughed, and Jowan finally spoke up again, "Seems you've met some rather... colorful people, Kade?"

"You don't know that half of it. Back in town there's a Qunari and a Chantry sister that says the Maker told her in a dream to join us. I also seem to have come into the possession of a Mabari."

Jowan shook his head. "It's only been a few weeks since we left the tower and so much has happened. Do you know what happened to Lily?"

"This is a touching reunion and all, but we have things to do, don't we? There are walking dead about and you just want to talk. Am I the only sane one here?" Morrigan asked, as she continued forward.

"I'll... follow, if that's alright. I want to help, but I don't really want to be in the middle of it all."

"Whatever you say, Jowan."

The group followed Morrigan deeper into the castle dungeons. It was cold and water dripped onto the floor from cracks. Kayden half expected to be attacked by a swarm of giant spiders. He cringed at the thought, remembering a time back at the Tower when one of the senior enchanters had asked him to clear out an infestation of spiders in the store room. No wonder Jowan kept his distance.

They needed to get into the castle proper, but they didn't know the layout of the dungeons. Alistair had lived here, but they didn't expect him to know the layout of the dungeons. Children weren't often allowed in places like this, after all.

The group turned a corner into a long hall with a narrow stairway at the end. They hurried towards the stairway, not wanting to stay in the dreary dungeons any longer. Kayden couldn't help looking in the cells as they walked by. The cells were larger here and didn't seem to have any doors on them. They must have been used for something else at some point but Kayden was unsure. The first one was empty, the second one too, but when they came to the third one, they saw a body. No, there were two bodies, and in the next one their were more. They were covered in flies and the smell...

"Let's... hurry to the stairs," Kayden suggested. Their quickened steps were their silent agreement. Seeing the dead walking the previous night gave them all the more reason to continue, hoping with each step that the bodies here didn't stand up and attack them. However, luck was not on their side. As they narrow staircase grew closer, one of the bodies did stand up, blocking their path. Before he realized it, the group was surrounded.

Zevran disappeared into the shadows, but Kayden did not miss the elf curse under his breath before he was gone. Alistair drew his sword and Kayden followed suit. Kayden focused his magic again, pushing what he could into his movements like the night before. Why couldn't the dead just stay dead?

They fought their way through the undead and up the stairs. The hall beyond it was littered with more of them. They were swarmed. He knew that the only way for them to advance through the castle would be to take out as many as they could. So on they went, cutting down undead as the came. He found himself watching Zevran each time he emerged from the shadows, taking down undead quickly and cleanly.

At the end of the hall, they found Valena hiding in a small room. He told her the way they came was safe and to hurry back to her father. They continued on, but the door to the main hall was locked and no one had the skills to pick it.

"So where do we go now?" Kayden looked to Alistair. If anyone knew he would.

"Follow me." Alistair took them through the kitchens and to the cellar. Luckily, there were no undead there for them to fight, and they soon reached another staircase leading up to the main courtyard. The group came to the locked gates and opened them for the knights. Mission one success, Kayden thought with a grin. There wasn't much left. Now they needed to go in and find out exactly what had happened. With the knights, the undead would be much easier to fight if they came across them.

"The main hall is through these doors then?" Kayden asked. As the group collected in the center of the courtyard, the knights talking amongst themselves. Alistair nodded. Whatever was inside waiting for them was through those doors. Undead or demons. Undead were new to him, but Kayden was not unfamiliar with demons; he had to fight one in the Fade during his Harrowing after all. But Rage demons weren't the only type of demon. He was no fool, he would be prepared.

A hand was placed on his back. Kayden jumped. His wide-eyed gaze turned behind him and the elf chuckled. "Your attention is elsewhere, my friend."

"Don't... do that," Kayden managed to say. The elf laughed again and leaned closer, "You really do need to pay attention, we can't afford to have you daydreaming all the time."

Kayden draped an arm over Zevran's shoulders. "I am paying attention. How would you like to fight a demon unarmed?"

"That would be suicide. No, you are not paying attention, otherwise, you would have noticed me,." the elf replied, skillfully dodging Kayden's threat.

Kayden shrugged. "I've had to do it before."

Zevran looked over the man for a moment, carefully considering. Then he shook his head. "I'm not entirely sure I believe that. No offense, Warden."

"It was part of my..." Kayden was cut off when an earsplitting wail came from the far side of the courtyard and everyone covered their ears. Only seconds later, Kayden found himself on his back, staring at the grey, cloudy sky. He had been dragged away from the group and toward the stone wall.

A large axe came down with a whoosh, landing right next to his ear, narrowly missing his head and sheering off a bit of his hair.

"Holy Andraste's knickers!" He looked up to see a large undead monster wearing thick plated armor. He heard the metal of the knight's armor rustling and the clanging sounds of steel all around him. This thing wasn't the only monster attacking them.

Kayden rolled away as the axe came down for a second try and he kicked at the revenant's knees. As his boot hit bone, it let out another deafening wail. Kayden cried out, the sound reverberating though every inch of his being threatening to rip him apart. This was the first time he'd ever been subjected to a sonic attack and even after it was over, his ears were ringing and something hot was trickling down his jaw. Blood?

An arrow flew by him, hitting the ground a few meters to his left. He cringed and looked back at the revenant. He kicked at it again, then rolled back to his feet and blocked another sweep of the axe with Oathkeeper. He channeled his magic through the weapon, trying to force the creature back against the wall.

"So, you wanna play, huh? Well I have a game for you! It's called 'Let's see who can stay still the longest!'" He let a spell loose, stunning the creature. He wondered how long that would last; this thing was rather strong, stronger than the other undead they had been fighting. But every second without one of those Banshee wails was good for him.

He didn't wait for the spell to wear off. A good, clean stroke, and he took the revenant's head. "Looks like I lost the game. Oh well, we can always play again another time."

"I'm not so sure, it looks like there was an order for his beheading." Zevran chuckled behind him. He heard the thump of another undead hitting the ground.

"What a shame. I do like that game."

"Well don't look at me, I rather like being able to move."

Kayden laughed. "I know a good spell for that. Better than the one I just used. A lot more fun."

"Are you trying to bed me? You know you could just ask."

Kayden turned around this time and raised an eyebrow. "Are you like this with everyone?"

"Mostly." Zevran hummed. Kayden rolled his eyes and joined the rest of the group since the remainder of the undead had been defeated.

He met Morrigan's gaze as he reached the stairs. "Are you done flirting with the assassin?"

"I don't know what -"

" 'I know a good spell for that'? Please, I can tell," she said, cutting him off. "That man tried to kill you the other day, and he could have succeeded. 'Tis best you keep that in mind and not get too close to him."

"I appreciate the advice, Morrigan, but I think I can take care of myself."

"That is to be seen. Just don't... let your guard down."

Kayden sighed. "I'm sorry. I understand what you are trying to say. You don't need to worry."

Morrigan's lip curled in disgust. "I am not worried!" She quickly turned away and ascended the stairway.

Alistair walked up behind him. How much he had heard, Kayden wasn't sure, but if Morrigan thought he was being flirty with Zevran, the others likely did too. "Total bitch, right? Come on, let's go. Hopefully, we made it in time."

"I hope you're right."

They entered the castle again, this time through the large wooden doors at the gate that led to the main hall. Teagan was safe, alive at least. However, he and the knights were under some sort of a charm and he was dancing for the amusement of a child. The child stopped Teagan and his gaze turned to the woman standing next to him. It was Isolde, the woman they met by the windmill a few hours ago, Teagan's sister-in-law.

"What is this, mother?" He asked, gesturing towards Kayden. His voice was not the voice of a child. Jowan had been right.

"He's just a man, Connor, like your father."

"Oh, I'm flattered. Funny how most people seem to treat me as if I were an abomination like your son."

"He is NOT an abomination!"

Kayden shrugged. "Sure could have fooled me."

Connor became angry. Kayden wasn't at all like his father; he wasn't on the verge of death. Things quickly turned ugly. Teagan and the bewitched men attacked as Connor ran off. The unaffected knights helped, and they tried their best not to injure the men. A good beating brought them back to their senses. Alistair and Isolde were both grateful that Teagan was still in one piece. Now to deal with Connor.

After talking to Isolde and Jowan, they learned that Connor had made a deal with a demon within the Fade to keep his father alive. The demon was controlling Connor from there, and not actually possessing him.

"So we can fix this then?" Kayden asked.

"Yes, but it would require entering the Fade. Usually it requires a few mages and a lot of lyrium, but I know of a ritual that can send you into the Fade. This would require blood though, life energy and a lot of it... All of it."

"Blood magic! Just what we need!" Alistair yelled. "Two evils don't make things right!"

"I can do it," Isolde said, stepping forward, "If my son has a chance to live, I will sacrifice myself for him."

"Are you sure about this?" Teagan asked, worry in his voice.

Kayden shook his head. The Circle was just across the lake. If Teagan could supply them with a boat, they might have enough time to go there and seek the aid of the Circle and enter the Fade without another death on their hands. Maker knew this family had already been through a lot.

"I have a better plan. I'm going to go to the Circle and bring more mages here. Don't worry, you'll get your chance to redeem yourself. You trust me, right?"

Jowan nodded slowly. "Of course I do. I know you once called me friend, but-"

"Right right," Kayden interrupted, "cut the mushy crap, we'll talk about this later. Now you be a good boy and wait here for me, okay?"

"It seems like I'm always waiting for you."

"Yeah, that seems to be our thing." He turned to Bann Teagan. "How soon can you have a boat ready?"

**o O o**

Feathered pen slid across parchment, drawing the intricate formula of a new spell. It had been days since he had been able to sit down and work in his spell journal and the calm, relaxing glide of the boat across the lake put him in just the right mood to work. Below the diagrams, he wrote in detail how the spell would work and how to control the magical energies used. It was almost done and he'd soon be able to write the final version neatly into his Spellbook. It was perfect.

He was listening to the sounds of the waves, the light breeze, and the bustle of the boat's crew as he worked. Taking in and trying to memorize movement patterns and footsteps and trying to distinguish between the sounds made by them and his friends that he had brought with him on the short trip. Alistair he knew was talking to some of the crew on the other side of the main deck, but Zevran he hadn't seen in at least an hour.

It was fine though. It was nice to have some quiet time to himself, something he seemed to be missing more and more recently as his privacy became smaller the larger his group became. It was hard to tell that it had really been almost a month since he had left the tower. Study time had been something he had taken for granted.

It was then that he heard footsteps. Not one of the crew, and not Alistair. Zevran, he thought. Trying to test him again most likely, but he would be ready this time. He was not going to be caught off guard. The footsteps stopped a few feet behind him. He didn't wait for Zevran; instead, he reached behind him and grabbed Zevran by the arm.

He was clumsy, and instead of pulling the assassin to sit next to him, he practically knocked Zevran over, and a few seconds later he was sprawled across Kayden's lap. Maybe Zevran had done it on purpose. Kayden blushed and looked away, quickly trying to compose himself and pull the assassin off of him.

"S... sorry," he managed to say, helping the elf straighten up. Zevran seemed a bit surprised, but more amused than anything.

"You were paying attention this time," Zevran said, taking a seat next to Kayden. "Your hands are freezing. Are you feeling alright?"

"My hands?" Kayden looked down at his hands for a moment. They didn't feel any different than usual. Were they really that cold? He shook his head. "I feel just fine."

He lifted the pen and continued writing in his journal. The spell was just about done, it only needed a few more components to the formula.

Zevran reached for his right hand and Kayden flinched a bit, looking over at the elf, but then allowed him to take it. His hands were warm and soft and they began gently rubbing Kayden's palm. It felt nice. "Is it really that cold?" He asked, his other hand still hard at work.

Zevran nodded. "Very. What are you working on?"

"It's a spell."

"Really? What language is that?"

Kayden put the pen down and looked at Zevran again. "It's not written in a specific language. That's my personal cipher."

Zevran looked the page over for a moment, trying to understand it. "Why would you write your spells in a cipher?"

"It's not just any cipher, it's a magic cipher. This is how I was taught to scribe my spells. From what I've heard most mages do this so that people can't read their spellbooks. Even if you are a mage you need a spell to read someone else's spellbook or you need to learn their cipher. It's kind of a privacy thing."

"Why go through such lengths for that?"

Kayden shrugged. "In the tower, privacy was hard to come by. Anything you could do to make things more personal and private were things we learned to appreciate. This was one such thing."

Zevran nodded. "I can understand that. I never had much privacy growing up either. What was it like growing up at the tower?"

"You don't want me to bore you with tower life." Kayden chuckled, trying not to look Zevran in the eye. He had hated his life in the tower and had wished every day to be able to leave. To go outside even and see the sun directly and not through one of those tiny windows. He remembered one of the templar telling him the only other way out was through a window and he didn't recommend trying it. He had laughed at the time, but the windows were way too small for him to climb out of, unless of course he was a six year-old elf.

"I'm sure it's not that boring, but if you really don't want to talk about it, I won't force you."

"I didn't fit in, from the day I went there. How could someone like me?" Kayden's head dropped in his hands. "People usually look at mages as if they are demons just waiting to awaken, but even the apprentices treated me like one. I thought that being there would be different, being around people like me. No one there was like me. Not a single one."

Zevran put an arm around Kayden's shoulder. "And why would you want to be like everyone else? Now that really would be boring. You're fine just the way you are."

Kayden looked back at Zevran for a moment. Did he really mean that? It had been terrible being so different while he was there, but he was now a full-fledged mage of the Circle and a Grey Warden. He had a chance to prove that he wasn't the demon they had made him out to be. All of a sudden, he began feeling incredibly foolish for letting Zevran see him acting like this.

He straightened up in his seat and looked over his journal for a moment before closing it and putting it and his pen away.

"I'm sorry, Zevran. What is it you want to know about the tower?"

"Zev."

"What?"

"I told you before, it's Zev to my friends. And we are friends, yes?"

Kayden smiled. "Alright. Zev it is then. But from now on you will stop calling me 'Warden'. It's Kade to my friends."


	6. Chapter 5: Bound in Blood Part II

A/N: Sorry this took so long. A lot of things came up IRL. I hope it was worth the wait! Thanks again to ShebasDawn for betaing!

* * *

**Chapter 5: Bound in Blood Part II**

His back hit the wall with surprising force. Kayden tried his best to hide behind his cold, lyrium gaze as the angry apprentice glared at him. The boy was becoming more and more frustrated at Kayden's lack of response while his friends fidgeted behind him, wary of getting too close.

"Don't think just because Enchanter Torrin excused you that you will get off that easily!"

Kayden's eyes met the apprentice's for a moment and he raised an eyebrow. What had happened, while Kayden's fault, had been purely accidental. He was told this, but he didn't believe a word of it, none of this friends did either.

A dark-haired elf looked up from his book across the room, a shocked expression on his face. He quickly looked back to his reading material, most likely hoping he would not be noticed as he sank down into his chair. If the other apprentices noticed, they didn't say anything.

"Come on Dilon, you're wasting your time. He never talks to anyone except that creepy Jowan kid." One of his friends tried reasoning with him. He took a step back, but the others were beginning to become more bold and circled around Dilon and Kayden. Dilon ignored his friend.

"Just because you're the First Enchanter's star doesn't mean you're better than any of us!" Dilon spat, clenching tightly at Kayden's collar, stretching the fabric. The fabric of fresh, new robes. It didn't matter to Kayden how angry the apprentice got, he would not give in.

"Say something, Fade-boy!" Dilon yelled again.

"You should listen to your friend. You are wasting your time," he finally said, lyrium eyes gleaming in defiance as they captured the ambient light.

Dilon's face grew red. If it was possible for his eyes to narrow more, they were now. He looked to one of his friends for a moment, then his fiery gaze met lyrium again. Kayden didn't notice the fist until it collided with his face throwing it to the side and slamming against the stone wall, leaving a harsh scrape on his cheek. The blow had been full of electricity and he felt his nerves tingle painfully in the aftermath, his jaw white-hot.

The dark-haired elf got up, panic-stricken, and ran from the room. The others didn't seem to notice, their eyes watching the scene, waiting to see if they might be needed. Kayden did not fight back as he still was trying to recover the first blow, but before it could completely sink in, Dilan landed another. This time to his stomach.

Kayden lurched forward, clutching his stomach. He tried to breath, but his lungs didn't seem to want to work. Two of Dilon's friends grabbed him by the shoulders and pulled him up. They turned him around and pushed him against the wall, his face hitting the cold, rough stone again. What were they doing now? He couldn't be completely sure, but he heard the sound of snipping and shearing.

The two holding his shoulders laughed as Dilon finished and they followed him out of the room. Kayden slumped to the floor, lifting a long strand of silver hair. His hair. He had been letting it grow out long just like the nice templar's, the man he had assumed was his father. Besides the occasional gift, this was all he had to remember him by. And now...

The dark-haired elf entered the room again, Jowan and Niall in tow. The elf watched by the door as the two rushed over to Kayden. He clung desperately to Jowan, soft sobs escaping his lips. "My hair... they cut my hair..."

Niall ran a hand through Kayden's hair. It was sloppy and jagged, and it wasn't the same length throughout. They stayed with him for a few minutes, letting him cry on the older boy's shoulder before helping him up and walking him to the washroom. Niall wet a rag and cleaned the scrape on Kayden's cheek. It was dirty and bleeding, but it wasn't bad. It was an easy heal.

"This has to stop. You need to tell one of the enchanters," Niall said as he gently patted the rag over his cheek. He turned to Jowan and instructed him to bring a pair of shears so he could fix Kayden's hair.

"I... can't," Kayden said, shaking his head. His jaw ached as he spoke and he found himself opening it and stretching to feel the sharp pain over and over again, fascinated by the sensation. Dilon had used some sort of electricity spell and it almost felt as if his jaw were about to go numb. "They already hate me because the First Enchanter himself tutors me. If I say anything it will only make things worse."

"We have to do something about this or it will never stop. I can go to an enchanter myself if I have to," Niall insisted. Jowan handed him the shears he asked for and Niall set to work evening out Kayden's hair.

"That is not... necessary. Your Harrowing is coming up, you need to be focusing on that."

"Niall is right, Kade. We really need to do something about them." Kayden looked over at Jowan, but Niall gently moved his head back into place so he could continue cutting.

"I can't do it. Let's just stop talking about it now..." He glued his eyes to the floor and they stayed silent for a while as he memorized the flecks in the stone and the way the light hit it, leaving many portions appear to be glittering. His eyes drew lines between the specks.

After a while, Kayden finally spoke up again. "That elf from earlier... with the dark hair that went to get you, who is he?"

Niall set the shears aside and looked over Kayden's hair, then ushered him over to one of the vanities so he could see it in the looking glass.

"Oh, that's Alim. He's a friend of mine, just a year younger than you. Maybe I'll introduce the two of you some time."

Kayden nodded absent-mindedly as he looked over his hair in the looking glass. It was too short for his taste, but it didn't look terrible. Niall had always been the one to take care of his hair for him though, he trusted Niall with it, but...

He fought back tears again. It would be a while before he got used to this, but it was just hair, right? He could grow it back if he wanted to. But even so, it still hurt. He looked from Niall to Jowan, then back at the floor again.

"Thank you," he said slowly, his gaze shifting back toward the floor.

"What are friends for?" Jowan said, putting a reassuring arm around Kayden's shoulder. Kayden flinched at first, but quickly relaxed against Jowan with a deep breath.

Niall ruffled Kayden's hair, "Let's go get supper, alright?"

These were his friends. They were both a few years his senior, but they were always there for him whenever he needed someone. Around them he always felt safe.

"Okay, I'd like that."

**o O o**

Even with the gentle and relaxing rhythm of the rocking boat beneath him, Kayden couldn't help but feel dread in the pit of his stomach as they grew closer and closer to the Tower looking in the distance. Suddenly, he felt like a child again, on his way to that cold, dark prison where he lived for ten years. But back then he had the nice templar to cling to. The nice templar that he never saw again after that day.

As they grew closer, he couldn't help but wonder; was going to the tower really the right thing to do? Sure, it would be a way to keep any more of the arl's family from dying, if things went their way, but he wasn't sure he really wanted to be back at the Tower. Things had gotten ugly before he became a Warden, and he was more than lucky Duncan was recruiting, otherwise... He didn't even want to think about where he'd be right now.

The little dock at the Tower was much too small for one of the arl's boats, and they found themselves docking on the shores of Lake Calenhad. He couldn't help but feel something was wrong as he led the way toward the ferry. Something was terribly wrong.

Kester, the ferryman, wasn't there, and in his place was a templar. This templar in particular was loosing it already from all the lyrium, but he knew this man, and for a moment the sense of dread subsided when he saw green hair.

It took everything to keep himself from laughing. Alim's work no doubt. Alistair and Zevran exchanged confused glances and Kayden held up a hand. He turned around and let it out. This wasn't a completely new thing from Alim, he'd done things like this to the templar before, usually the younger ones, but Carrol had always been his favorite to mess with. He shouldn't have been surprised, what he _should_ have been surprised about was why Carrol was manning the ferry.

When the laughter subsided, he walked out onto the small dock. The sense of dread hit him again as he looked over the tower.

"I need to get to the tower," Kayden said, getting to business right away. There wasn't much reasoning he could do with a lyrium-addicted templar. He really want to talk to the man more than he had to anyway.

"Shoo, Spook. Go away," the templar said, shifting from one foot to the other.

Kayden gritted his teeth. "You realize I'm a Grey Warden now, right? I have these papers-"

"I have papers too. They say I'm the Queen of Antiva," Carrol interrupted.

"Aren't queens usually female?" he asked. Zevran and Alistair seemed to be trying hard not to laugh now.

"Don't question royalty!"

"Someone's had way too much lyrium. Now enough of the games, let us cross."

"No, enough of _your_ games. I don't care who you are now. You've left the Tower, and what's going on here now is not Grey Warden business. So shoo, Spook."

"What kind of name is 'Spook' anyway? Last I checked, my handsome friend had a name," Zevran chimed in. Carrol stared at the elf for a moment, seemingly shocked, but he didn't respond.

"Handsome?" Kayden asked, bemused.

"Yes, handsome. Does that make you uncomfortable?"

"Pfft. Nope!" Kayden laughed, but before he could add more, Carrol cut back in. "This still doesn't change anything. I'm still not letting you cross."

Kayden's sword was pointing at Carrol's throat before he had a chance to blink. "Let me rephrase that then; you WILL let us cross. NOW."

He wasn't sure what the others were thinking, but he could see that Zevran had his hands on his daggers, just in case. Kayden knew things weren't going to get ugly here, not now. Carrol had had too much lyrium and he knew he had pushed Carrol just far enough to get what he wanted today.

Carrol raised his arms in defeat. "Right, we're going to the tower then. Don't rock the boat! Don't wanna fall in! I hear there's sea monsters lurking about today!"

Zevran looked at the lake. "Are there really?"

"I find that hard to believe," Alistair replied.

"There are no monsters in the lake. The ferry is perfectly safe. Get in!" He ushered the two into the little boat, Carrol following behind them.

"So pushy today. I like it!" Zevran said. He glanced at Kayden, but Kayden's eyes were fixed on the tower, the look in his eyes unsettling. Zevran looked at the tower too. It was unmistakable, something really was wrong.

"What's going on, Carrol?" Kayden asked, not taking his eyes off the tower.

"You should ask the commander. I wasn't told, he just said I had to watch the ferry. 'Let no one in!' he said." Carrol shook his head; he had failed at that job.

The rode in silence to the tiny dock at the base of the dark tower. Despite all his fears that maybe he shouldn't have come, it was too late now. Plus, they had the treaties and the Circle of Magi were part of the treaties. This would be killing two birds with one stone, right? They get help with the demon problem at Redcliffe and acquire mages for the army. So much could go wrong and for some reason he knew today was one of those days.

The lights all seemed to be off on the top few floors; the templar's quarters, the harrowing chamber and the Great Hall, were all completely dark. The other floors had some scattered light, but not much.

"Maker's breath, what are we getting ourselves into today?" Alistair asked when they finally reached the dock and got out of the boat. It took all three of them to push open the main doors and they entered the hall. There were templar everywhere. Some were on the floor, covered in blood, while others were attending them. The large doors on the other side of the room were shut tight. There was another set of doors that he knew would take more than one man to open.

"Look what we have here, a full-time Warden now? I'm glad to see you are still alive, but right now is not a good time."

"Are you really glad to see I'm alive, Greagoir? If I remember correctly the last time I saw you, you were wishing you had made me tranquil."

Alistair's head shot between the two of them, eyes wide. He knew full well the process of making one tranquil and he could not imagine Kayden...

"I was angry at the time, don't think I forgot about your part in Jowan's escape. But the past is the past and right now there are other things I need to worry about. This is not a problem for the Wardens."

Kayden crossed his arms over his chest. "You forget that I am not just a Warden, but a mage of this Circle. This was my home..." he started. He swallowed deeply; this had also been his prison. "Please, tell me what is going on here."

Greagoir sighed, and turned to look at the thick metal doors that led to the Apprentice Quarters. Then he explained what was going on. Uldred's uprising, blood mages, demons. So many were dead or had become abominations. He and the templar here were finally able to get away and close the doors behind them. He was now awaiting the Rite of Annulment.

"You can not annul the whole tower!" Kayden yelled. Greagoir actually looked sheepish for once. This was clearly something he didn't want, but he had seen no other choice. "I can't let that happen. Before someone can get back with the order, let me investigate. I'll look for survivors and make sure Uldred is dealt with."

"_We_ will look for survivors," Alistair added and Zevran nodded his agreement, placing a hand on Kayden's shoulder. Kayden silently thanked his friends. He was more than glad to have their support.

Greagoir seemed to consider this for a moment. He didn't believe anyone was left on the other side, but if there was any chance Irving was alive... "I will allow you to go, but know this; I will not open those doors again unless First Enchanter Irving himself is there to tell me the tower is secure. Do you understand?"

"Then I have my work laid out for me. I'm ready to go," Kayden replied. There were still people in the tower he cared about, and he hoped beyond hope that they were still alive. Alim, Niall... He hadn't been able to protect Jowan, but he still lived at least. He had to make sure his other friends were safe now too.

"There is one more thing," Greagoir interrupted his thoughts and pointed to the corner of the room near the Quartermaster. "A gift arrived for you the day after you left with Duncan."

"Is it from him?" Kayden asked, not specifying who 'him' was, but Greagoir knew. The templar nodded and added, "He left a letter this time. It's on the table, still sealed."

Kayden's eyes widened. A letter? That was unusual. "How did he know my size?" he asked still staring in the corner.

"We gave him the measurements taken when you were being fitted for your new robes. Now hurry. We don't have all day. Put them on and get going."

Kayden finally approached the gift. New robes and... armor. Alistair said he had needed armor. The style was similar to the templar armor, however, it was only half-plate with chain mail instead of the full breastplate. All of it, including the black robes, were covered in arcane runes. It was beautiful.

He lifted the letter off the table and broke the seal. Zevran crowded around him, trying to read the letter. He apparently had no mind for personal space. "Who is it from?"

"My father... I think. It says in the letter that this was meant to be a gift for my Harrowing. But why would he get me armor for my Harrowing?"

"You think? You don't know if he is your father or not?"

Kayden shook his head. "I don't. I never really knew him, and no one told me he was. I just kind of got that feeling that he was. Didn't you know your father?"

"I never knew my father. I was raised by whores. Didn't I tell you that?"

"I... yes, you did. We talked about that last night, didn't we?"

Alistair fidgeted behind them. Alistair knew who his father was, Kayden knew. But he had been a bastard and was raised by Eamon. His father's wife's brother. How confusing that must have been growing up. And Eamon's wife, Isolde hadn't been incredibly nice when Alistair was growing up in Redcliffe. Kayden decided it would be best to end the topic of fathers there, knowing it was an uncomfortable subject for Alistair.

"Do you think you could help me put this on?" Kayden finally asked. He'd never worn armor like this before and he wasn't sure he'd be able to even reach all the buckles.

Zevran grinned, "Do I get to watch you luridly as you take your robes off?"

Kayden stared at him for a moment, then turned to Alistair. "Will you help me?"

"Of course. I'm going to have to show you how to take care of this. This is really nice armor."

A few minutes later the huge doors closed behind them and the Apprentice Quarters lay before them. It was eerily quiet, though there was an occasional scream. Dead bodies littered the floor, mages and templar alike. There had been a lot of mages at the tower, enough that he hadn't known everyone there, but there were faces he recognized. Memories flooded back, memories he had tried to forget.

Kayden shivered. If this really had been a bad idea, it was more than too late now. There was no going back, so with a deep breath, he pushed himself forward, trying not to identify all the bodies he passed along the way. Panic rose with each new body and he prayed to whoever would listen that Alim and Niall were not among the dead.

After finding no survivors in the dormitories, he decided to move on. The group moved out into the hall and at the sound of an explosion and a myriad of crackling, screams, and others sounds he couldn't determine, they ran.

Just before the library, they found survivors. Wynne was dispatching a rage demon, and when she finished, she turned to address someone in the group.

"Alim Surana! That sort of magic is not good in close quarters like this! Think of the children!" She scolded.

Kayden's gaze moved from the old woman to a small elf, standing with the other survivors. His arms were across his chest and his dark hair messy. He looked terribly bored. Only Alim could manage to look bored when the world was falling apart around you. His robes were that of a full Circle mage, Kayden noticed. He had gone through his Harrowing while Kayden was away.

"No more Walking Bombs!" she added. He looked like he was about to protest, but his head turned to the side when he heard Kayden and his group running up. The elf's eyes lit up. He could only imagine how it looked to the other survivors, both full Circle mages and apprentices. One of the more religious ones turned away in disgust.

"Kade!" Alim exclaimed, running over to embrace him. "Wynne said you were at Ostagar, but she didn't know what happened to you. I'm so happy you're alive... With Jowan gone... So much has happened, Kade."

"I see. Congratulations on your Harrowing."

Alim gave him a sly grin. One that was obviously up to no good. Kayden decided it would be best not to ask.

"It is nice to see you again, Kayden. If only it could be at a better time," Wynne replied, gesturing to a barrier she erected. She filled him in on what happened on the mage's end, Alim interrupting often to add details where he was involved. Each of which prompted more scolding from Wynne.

"We have to find the First Enchanter and secure the tower. I don't know how much time we have, Greagoir sent for the Rite..."

"We must hurry then." Wynne turned back toward her barrier. They would have to press forward, and she insisted on joining them in their search for the First Enchanter.

"I'm coming too," Alim finally said.

"No you are not! You need to stay here and help protect the children," Wynne protested.

"Not if we're killing all the demons and abominations on the way. I for one don't want to sit here and wait for the prison guards to come back with the Rite of Annulment while you get all the action, injured no less. No, I'm coming, if you want something done right, you do it yourself."

"This is not a prison, you know that."

"I dunno, with how tightly they've locked the doors... If it wasn't before it sure is now." Alim snapped his fingers and electricity erupted around him, crackling out like tiny fireworks. "Let's get a move on, grandma!"

Wynne huffed and turned to take down the barrier. "Well at least this way I know you won't be doing anything reckless to endanger the children."

"Is he always like this?" Alistair whispered into Kayden's ear.

"Mostly. You are lucky we did not step into any traps on the way here."

Alim turned back to Kayden, "Oh! Introductions are in order! Who are your friends? Fellow Grey Wardens? Just names will do for now, we need to hurry. We'll have proper introductions later."

"I'd like to point out that I am actually not a Grey Warden. But it is a compliment to be called one, yes?" Zevran started, before he could continue, Alim cut him off. "You talk too much, I asked for your name!"

Kayden almost laughed. He could tell Zevran had been a bit intrigued with Alim at first, but after being told he talked too much, he deflated a bit. But only a bit.

"My name is Zevran."

"And the big guy?" He asked, pointing to Alistair.

"Am I really big?" Alistair asked.

"Maybe to an elf," Kayden offered. "This is Alistair. Alim, be nice to them, there's no need-"

"Talk later! Let's go!"

Alim bolted as soon as the barrier came down, and the others followed after him. Kayden didn't remember him being so fast.

"Insufferable brat..." he said, watching the elf run.

Zevran laughed, "I'm used to people saying that about me. The insufferable part."

"You're not as bad as him, believe me."

Electricity erupted and crackled from Alim's fingertips at a snap, each motion loud and clear, and erupted through the library as he dispatched abominations. At least he wasn't making any walking bombs. To Alim's credit though, he was a talented healer. It wasn't something he liked doing much, he preferred more flashy magic. He healed each injury as quickly as he could though, leaving virtually no lingering pain.

He stayed away from melee combat; he didn't even have a staff. Kayden only briefly wondered where it might be, but it seemed he didn't need one. Between his electric and fire attacks, he sometimes pulled flasks from his pouch and threw them. The glass would break and explode leaving whatever enemy it hit in flames. Some of the vials were full of acid and dissolved their skin.

"Just so you know, I set up traps. Everywhere. I remember where some of them are, but..." Alim looked back at that group and grinned.

"I'm pretty good at finding traps, my friend. We have nothing to worry about." Zevran ran besides them now, daggers flashing as he struck down another abomination.

"We need to find Niall," Alim said.

"Niall? So he's still alive?" Kayden asked.

Alim looked back at him for a moment, and suddenly his smile was gone. "I hope so..."

Kayden's steps suddenly became more urgent and he sprang after Alim, not even worrying if the others could keep up. Alistair and Zevran were doing just fine, but Wynne... Why did she even bother coming along? She was wounded already, wasn't she? They had no time to wait. Once in a while Alim would stop to make sure she was okay, then rush ahead of the group again. Kayden said nothing though. Wynne had been Alim's tutor, and despite the bickering, he knew Alim cared more about others than he let on.

"He was looking for the Litany of Adralla. There are blood mages everywhere," Alim explained as they ran. "The demons are possessing bodies indiscriminately. Not even templar have been safe."

"Watch out, trap there." Zevran gestured just ahead of them. Alistair practically ran into Kayden as he and Alim stopped. Zevran knelt over and disarmed the trap.

Alim's hands were on his hips. "Hey! Those were meant for the blood mages! I put so much work into those!"

"Yes, but it wouldn't be good for us to step into them, would it?" Zevran pointed out.

"Pfft, whatever."

They moved on and were finally confronted by a bewitched templar. Kayden held his ground, deflected each thrust of their swords and froze their armor. To his side, Zevran emerged from the shadows and stuck another templar in the back. The templar collapsed.

He turned to Kayden and grinned. "Is anyone keeping score?"

"Because killing possessed templar is a fun game," Alistair snorted, blocking a sword with his shield.

"To be fair, that one probably deserved it," Alim offered as Alistair cut another down.

"Alim!" Wynne yelled behind them.

The elf shrugged. "It's true."

"Is this a bad time to mention that Alistair's a templar?" Kayden said, hoping to quiet Alim.

"Ex-templar," Alistair corrected.

The fighting spilled out onto the stairs. They took the steps three at a time. They were making too much noise, but it didn't matter. If it had only been Zevran, Alim, and Wynne, they probably could have easily gone through the tower and easily surprised any enemies. It was another story with Kayden and Alistair wearing heavy armor. It just wasn't going to happen.

They fought their way up, sometimes throwing collapsed bodies behind them. They rolled down the stairs and hit the walls. The higher they climbed, the darker the tower became. Soon, they started seeing piles of refuse and flesh congealed together in wet masses. They stuck to the floors, walls, and columns around them. Even the statues were not safe.

The next floor was where the templar were housed. Other than the dorms, there were large open areas for sword practice; the walls had been lined with weapon and armor racks that might have been full of practice equipment before the uprising, but now they were broken and scattered about the floors. The flesh piles stuck to those too.

"Maybe I shouldn't have had that extra pie at lunch." Zevran gagged. "Oh well."

Kayden would have suggested not looking at them, but they were everywhere. He'd have to close his eyes not to see them, and that wouldn't be good for any of them. He wasn't going to mention that he was almost about to lose his lunch as well. No way.

Alistair shivered. "Is it just me, or did it just get colder?"

"I think so," Wynne replied. Zevran and Alim nodded their agreement.

"Colder? You think so? I didn't notice," Kayden said. It might have been because of his armor, but Alistair's armor was just as heavy as his.

"That's because your veins are made of ice," Alim joked.

"Ha ha, very funny," Kayden said dryly. Alim laughed, but stopped. His eyes went wide as he looked around. The sound lingered and echoed across the room and then nothing. It was quiet up here. Too quiet.

They continued down the hall, slower this time, trying not to make too much noise. All the floors had very similar layouts and the door leading to the central hall, like all the ones in the previous floors, led to the next set of stairs. Kayden slowly opened the door and cursed under his breath as the rusting hinges squeaked and echoed throughout the hall, announcing their arrival.

A body was on the floor, a demon hovering over it. Was that Niall?

"Oh look, visitors. I'd entertain you but... too much effort," the demon said as he turned around.

"Niall! What have you done to him?" Kayden demanded through gritted teeth.

"He's just resting. Poor thing was just so very, very weary. You'd like to join him, wouldn't you? You could just lay down and forget it all."

"No! Let him go now, or I will find a better way to entertain myself!"

"Why must everyone resort to violence? Wouldn't it be better just to rest? Leave it all behind?"

"Resist!" Wynne tried to warn them. She was so very far away, and Kayden so very sleepy. Maybe it would be better just to rest a little bit. He could always fight the demons and darkspawn later. They would wait, right? Yes, everything would wait for him. It always did, but even if it didn't, someone else would do it. Someone better suited than he was.

"Kayden!" Alim's voice was the last thing he heard as the Dreams took him.


	7. Chapter 6: Bound in Blood Part III

A/N: I'm sorry this chapter took forever to finish. I'd like to take a moment to thank doorbellspider and bethadots for helping bounce some ideas around! Also, a huge thanks to shebasdawn! :D

* * *

**Chapter 6: Bound in Blood Part III**

Kayden jolted awake as the door slammed against the wall and an over-excited little elf entered the room.

"Do you have to do that all the time?" Kayden asked, sitting up, hands rubbing his temples. He looked around the room. It was unfamiliar. He was an a canopied bed, the sheets made of fresh, soft silks, the walls were made of stone and intricate tapestries covered them. Some depicted Wardens mounted atop griffins, others had lions and a few had men battling darkspawn.

"Well I did come in here to wake you. You don't want to know what Plan B was," Alim said with a grin, and walked over to the armoire. "You need to put on something nice today, the others are waiting for us."

"Where are we?" Kayden finally asked.

Alim turned around and looked at him, a frown on his face. "Wynne said you would act like this, though I didn't want to believe her. I guess you _did_ take a pretty nasty blow on the head last night, Does it hurt? Niall has been worried."

Kayden's eyes narrowed slightly and he raised an eyebrow. He wasn't actually in any pain, in fact, he felt quite well rested, like he had just had the best sleep in his entire life. He laughed a bit, Niall really _would_ be worried. "I feel just fine, but that doesn't tell me where we are."

"Oh! Right, we are currently at the royal palace in Denerim, guests of King Cailan. There's a festival today, and we are the guests of honor, you know, being Grey Wardens and all."

"Festival? What for?"

Alim shook his head. "You really don't remember anything, do you? A year ago today we ended the Blight; killed the archdemon, set the underground lairs ablaze. Glorious! Well at least that's what Cailan said." Alim giggled and threw an outfit onto a trunk at the foot of the bed. "Hurry, put that on. I said the others are waiting, don't be a slow poke!"

Alim was closing the door behind him before Kayden could say anything else. King Cailan was supposed to be dead, wasn't he? Then again, he hadn't seen the body, maybe he had survived. Kayden stretched and pulled the blankets off. He shook his head; why didn't he remember everything that had happened? Amnesia? He had never had amnesia before, how would he know? It felt weird, disorienting, to think that he could have forgotten everything that happened in a year's time.

He threw his legs over the bed and stood up with a yawn. He stretched again and made his way to the foot of the bed, looking over the clothes Alim had laid out for him. He briefly wondered why Alim had done that, though it wasn't like Alim didn't do things like this back at the Tower anyway. He shrugged the thought away and dressed. Fancy clothes, not really his style, but he supposed if he were to be the King's guest he probably had to look presentable. The only good thing about them was the color; black certainly suited him best, making his eyes and hair stand out. He grinned at himself in the looking glass.

"He's awake?" Came a voice from outside his room. He looked to the door and listened for a moment. He wasn't sure what they were talking about, but it seemed to be an argument. He could tell the second voice was Alim's, the first was deeper with a thick Antivan accent. Zevran, he thought. A few minutes later, the voices stopped and the door opened.

Through the looking glass he watched as Zevran entered the room. He could see the deep frown on the assassin's face. What could they have been arguing about? The frown became a warm smile when he caught Kayden's eyes in the looking glass. Kayden finally turned around and the assassin strode over to him.

"They weren't going to let me in..." He started. Kayden gave him a curious look as the elf wrapped his arms around Kayden.

"Why... not?" Kayden managed to ask through his surprise. Zevran gave him a look, a look that told him he should know the answer to that. What in the Maker's name was going on?

"Well, come on," Zevran finally said, a hand reaching up to stroke Kayden's cheek. His hands were so warm, and Kayden could feel himself tilting his head into Zevran's hand. He wanted more, but the elf turned and walked back to the door, expecting Kayden to follow. He watched for a moment, and with a sigh, he began to move too.

They walked down the hall in silence, Zevran occasionally brushing against him. Kayden still was fuzzy. He was trying to accept the idea that he had amnesia. If it was really true...

Zevran let out a frustrated sigh and then roughly grabbed Kayden's hand. He looked over at the elf, wondering what had come over him. "Is... something wrong?"

"You," came Zevran's sharp reply. "You are acting odd today. I guess it is to be expected after yesterday, but I had hoped you'd at least remember this much."

"Remember what?" Kayden finally asked. Zevran squeezed his hand in reply, and he looked down at their hands, finger's locked. Was Zevran mad at him? "Zev, I'm sorry. I don't really remember anything. The last thing I remember was from before we stopped the Blight, in the Tower."

The assassin stopped abruptly, pulling his hand away. He looked up at Kayden, staring into his eyes for a moment. Kayden had never felt more awkward in his life as those eyes stared right through him. He felt heat rise in his cheeks the longer he shared Zevran's gaze, and before he knew it he felt his back hit the wall.

Zevran's lips were against his before he could fully realize what was happening. This couldn't possibly be real. It made no sense! Kayden was captured by those lips, and he let his eyes close and his arms raise to circle the other man's waist. This wasn't real!

When he opened his eyes a demon stood before him. Kayden's eyes narrowed and he pushed her away. She smirked and licked her lips. "Why did you stop, my love? Weren't you enjoying yourself?"

"Who are you? Why are you doing this?" His eyes narrowed, and he reached for his sword.

"I am Desire." She laughed. Her lips never moved, her voice seemed to be in his head and all around him at the same time. "Why do I do this? Why not? Aren't you happy here? I can give you iwhatever/i it is you desire." Her words were accentuated by her hands gliding up her body, feeling her assets. Kayden looked away. "I can give you power, I can give you magic, I can even give you love."

She gestured and Zevran appeared before him again. He was an illusion Kayden knew, but the resemblance was uncanny. He was beside Kayden again, his hands gently caressing both cheeks now. He leaned against Kayden and lifted himself up on his toes. The haughty illusion planted a kiss on his lips and he could feel its hot breath on his skin. Then Kayden pulled the illusion away by its hair.

"Stop this now."

"Why? Isn't he what you want? I can make him yours." Her voice was sweet, seductive, hypnotizing; it took every once of will Kayden had to look away. He wanted to say yes, he wanted so badly to give in, but he couldn't.

"No, it would be a lie. I want nothing from you, demon!"

The demon seemed surprised as Kayden lunged at her, sword in hand. She moved back, out of the way. He could hear the spell she chanted, and ice sprang up in a circle around him. Kayden called forth his magic and slammed through the ice, focusing on her.

"You can't defeat an ice mage with ice," he said with a grin. Her eyes became angry and with a wave of her hand, more columns of ice twisted up around him, and each time more appeared, he slammed them down just as quickly. She was fast though, dodging all of his attacks. How would he defeat a demon that was so damned fast?

_Focus_! That's what Morrigan had said when they fought the assassins. Focus. He calmed himself and pulled the magic to him. More ice shot up around him, caging him in. He ignored it.

"My my... I thought you said you couldn't defeat an ice mage with ice. Looks like I have the upper hand now." He could hear hear laughter through the ice. "Maybe I will take your body, mage."

It was not over yet. He smashed through the ice and conjured his own, sending them flying towards the demon. She dodged the ice, but was too late, the sword plunged through her midsection.

"How did you...? That magic you used, I haven't seen it in... such a long time."

Kayden shook his head, "Your problem is not my magic; you underestimate mages." He removed the sword from her flesh and she slumped to the ground. "Now it's over." The sword came down in an arc and barely sliced through her before her body disappeared. Her voice lingered in his head. "If you ever want to leave the Fade, you will have to defeat all the demons in this domain. Your demons."

He hated the Fade.

**o O o**

Kayden was unsure how long he had been wandering the Fade. The fog was thick and he figured by now he was traveling in circles. He couldn't lose hope, not now. His friends needed him, the Tower needed him.

Eventually, he came to an area with a bench where the fog receded somewhat. A man sat on the bench, head in his hands. When the man heard his approach, he looked up. He knew that face right away. It was Niall, but was this another trick?

"Are you my Niall?" Kayden asked, his hand almost reaching for his sword.

The man chuckled, "When did I become your Niall?"

"Oh you know what I mean. Are you really you and not just another Fade spirit here to trick me?"

"It's really me, I can assure you. Nice job getting out of that trap by the way."

"Are you sure? Is it really you?"

"Ask me something. How intelligent are the spirits anyway?" Niall seemed more amused than angry, but Kayden could tell he was nervous. Maybe he'd been in the Fade too long.

"I really don't know. Intelligent enough to mimic us. What about the Fraternities?"

"You always hated talking about the Fraternities." Niall laughed.

"It's true, and I disagreed with more than one of your opinions on them as well."

"But we really _should_ be Isolationists. Just think about it."

Kayden shook his head. "If we aren't around, how will they learn not to fear us?"

"They'll never learn. You know they won't. You've left the Tower, you've seen what people are like when they are ignorant of magic."

"You know, I can't believe we are talking about Fraternities in the Fade. There's so much that needs to be done right now."

"You are the one who brought it up, Kade. Do you believe that I'm really me now?"

Kayden took a deep breath and sat down on the bench beside Niall. He leaned over, elbows on his knees. "I never thought that one day we'd be stuck in the Fade like this. Not after all that training."

Niall nodded, also seeing the irony of it. He seemed to be resigned to his fate though. It was sad, listening to him wallowing in his depression as they talked. This man had always been the one to support him and to see him so broken now, it was just too much.

Niall had been in the meeting when Uldred had taken over. He hadn't been listening, the meetings were usually boring anyway. Kayden was glad he had never been to any of them, and thinking about it now almost a little sad that he'd never be able to. Not because he really wanted to be part of the Circle in the Tower, but because part of him was starting to agree with Niall, they really might be trapped in here forever.

"I did find out something interesting though," Niall finally said. Kayden turned to look at his friend. He had really expected to hear mostly just the same story he had been told again, but Niall had more? Another piece to the puzzle. "Jowan had been part of their band."

"What? Are you sure?"

Niall nodded, "Very. But Uldred had decided Jowan was useless. He was cast out of the group. One of Uldred's little minions became the eyewitness that Greagoir mentioned. You remember, right?"

Kayden nodded, it was all a set up from the beginning.

"Well they made sure the documents were in place for that girl. What was her name, the one Jowan had a dalliance with? Well it doesn't matter, she was sent away after you left. They wanted Jowan out of the picture though so he couldn't speak against them. That's why they went through all that trouble. I think Uldred hoped he'd be sentenced to death rather than made tranquil. Tranquil can still talk after all."

"That does make sense. Does this mean I foiled his plans?"

"Not really, Jowan is out of the picture, and it is unlikely he will return. Now we're trapped here and there's nothing we can do either." Niall's face dropped into his hands. "I don't think there's a way out. I've studied this area for so long, but every time I try to leave, I end up back here again. The fog is so thick, I cannot see!"

Kayden rested a hand on Niall's shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Now you're starting to sound like Jowan. I know you're stronger than that. You've always been there for me when I needed you."

Niall shook his head. "It was because you needed me that I seemed so strong. We were kids, you're four years younger than me. Look at you now; you're an adult. You're so much stronger than you were back then."

They sat in silence after that, for who knew how long. The silence just droned on as the fog rolled around them. Then he remembered his friends waiting for him; Alistair, Morrigan, Leliana, Alim... Zevran. It wasn't just his friends that needed him, he was a Grey Warden now.

Kayden stood up. "I can't just sit here, I have to find a way out."

"You're joking, right Kade? There's no way out! We're trapped here! It's... getting so cold. Don't you feel it?"

"Snap out of it, Niall! I'm getting us out of here. You sit tight, alright? I'll be back for you as soon as I can."

"No... Kade, don't leave. I don't know how much longer..."

"Then come with me." Kayden reached out his hand to Niall. "Weren't you the one who always told me your mother said you were destined for greatness? Let's go do something that will make her proud."

**o O o**

Niall stayed a few steps behind Kayden as they continued through the Fade. He was a healer, he was no fighter, so on Kayden pressed while Niall kept track of any injuries he gained along the way.

"I was able to see some of the demons before, but I was too afraid to fight them. There are a few, and they all seem to be guarding an island in the center. I believe that is where the Sloth demon is."

Kayden nodded as they continued and Niall continued to give him some descriptions of the demons. He mentioned the desire demon, but Kayden had already finished that one off. Though she had mentioned more demons awaited him, he hadn't wanted to believe it. What a pain, he thought. He wished the demon had lied, but Niall confirmed it was true.

"If we can defeat all of the demons, we will be able to access the island they are guarding then," Kayden finally replied.

"I think so, yes. Do you really think you can do it?"

"I have to try."

It was then Kayden realized they were being followed. He stopped, the shorter mage almost running into him.

"What is it?" Niall asked, looking around.

Kayden didn't answer, instead he focused on the arcane energies around them. There was so much of that in the Fade, it was hard to make the distinction between one or another.

Then it stopped. It was behind them now. Kayden grabbed Niall by the arm and pulled him away as the shadows swarmed around them. There was an echoing laughter as the shadows merged not far from where Niall had been standing. They formed a roughly humanoid shape of shadows with white, glowing eyes. He had seen monsters similar to this before, in fact there was a whole swarm of them mixed in with the undead in Redcliffe Castle. It was a shade, or at least it was a monster in the Fade that looked like shade... And now he was rhyming in his head.

"What is it?" Niall asked behind him.

The creature cackled like some mad old witch and raised an arm to them, its fingers were long with sharp nails. "I am fear. Your fear, your self-doubt, ambition lost."

Kayden sighed. "Seriously? I have to fight _this_? This is starting to sound like something from a children's story. I have no time for you, demon."

The thing looked surprised, well surprised as it could look with a face that lacked the ability to show emotion properly. It looked back and forth between the two mages for a moment, then leaned back. It lunged forward with a loud scream.

Kayden shook it off, but Nial dropped, wide-eyed cowering on the floor. A spell, Kayden thought. The sword glinted in the Fade, light cutting an arc into the fog. The shade moved back and then to the side. It wasn't as fast as the desire demon, but for some reason, Kayden couldn't get a solid hit on it. Had it cast another spell before he noticed?

The demon cackled again, it's razor sharp claws seeking flesh. Kayden moved back as he felt his energy being sapped from him. He dropped to a knee as the demon closed in on him. It came close, inches from his face and soon he could see light drawing out of him in a swirl as the demon devoured it. He felt himself growing weaker and cold. Cold was new for him, it could be below freezing and everyone around him would be shivering, but he would not feel cold. Why now?

Then a bold of light shot through the shade. It shrieked and recoiled back away from Kayden. Niall was behind him again, he could feel the warmth of healing energies wash over him. "Thanks."

Niall nodded to him and returned his gaze to the shade, sending another bolt of light its way. Kayden smiled. He hadn't known Niall had any damaging spells, but he was very grateful for them now. It was then he realized, he wasn't meant to fight this demon. This demon was Niall's.

The demon came back at them again, but this time Niall put up a shield of magical energy, holding the demon back. Kayden stood up, looking over the demon on the other side of the energy. "Kill it, Niall."

The man nodded, and released the energy again, and an explosion of light shot out in a circle around them. The shade shrieked again and disappeared. Niall looked back at Kayden. "Was that really it? It's gone?"

He continued looking around, not so sure. When it seemed like nothing more would happen, he returned to Kayden, looking him over for any sign of injury.

"What was that spell you used?" He finally asked after a while. Niall back up, deciding Kayden was fine.

"Nova," Niall answered after a few minutes. "Do you want to learn it?"

"Yeah... as soon as we get out of here. And don't say we're not getting out of here, 'cause we are. Both of us, and my friends." Niall didn't argue this time, but he didn't seem convinced. Kayden's face set into a deep frown as they continued on.

Soon, the fog began to clear a bit. He could see a structure in the distance. They moved onward and came to a ruined building. Inside was much like the rooms in the tower. The dorms from the senior mages' quarters.

The fog mostly rolled about the floor here as the walked down the hall. It was eerie how similar this looked to the Tower he remembered. The cold was creeping up on him again. Something he wasn't used to, it was incredibly uncomfortable. He didn't mention this to Niall, cold in the Fade was a bad sign, especially for someone that never felt cold.

They came to the end of the hall, facing a closed door. The only way forward was through that door. He looked back at Niall, meeting his eyes. The shorter mage gave him a slow nod and he pushed it open with a loud, rusty squeal. Beyond the portal revealed a Fade replica of the Harrowing Chamber; destroyed, debris everywhere, the ceiling open to the pale grey skies of the Fade.

In the center of the chamber stood a figure in white, his back to them. The man in white crossed his arms. "You're late, you know. I was wondering how much longer you'd make me wait."

That voice was familiar. Flashes of his childhood surfaced in his mind; sheared hair littering the floor, a slam against a stone wall, a fall down a flight of stairs, the screams... He stopped in his tracks and Niall almost bumped into him.

"Dilon," he whispered.

The man turned around, a wicked grin on his face. "So nice of you to remember me, Fade-boy. I can't let you get any further, unfortunately for you. I didn't really want to be here in the Fade, but I was told if I could kill you here, Master Uldred would accept me back into the fold. And that's just what I intend to do!"

A bolt of electricity shot passed Kayden's head, he barely had time to react as he pulled out his sword and a cloud of red grew around Dilon. A feint then? Well it worked, it bought him some time. Kayden wasn't going to let it happen again.

"Blood magic," Niall said, his eyes widening. He pushed back away from the other mages.

"Shit..." A metallic ring echoed around them. He had to stop Dilon and fast. He'd never fought a blood mage before, but he had heard stories of the type of things they could do. If Dilon were able to get into his mind, it would be all over here.

Dilon continued hurling attacks at him, mostly primal energies. Why would he use blood magic for that?

Shards of ice sprang from the channeled energies Kayden called, sending spears of cold toward Dilon. A burst of electricity, white hot, melted them in their tracks. Dilon was grinning on the other side of the steam.

The red cloud around him began to shift, to grow. It expanded and twisted until he could barely see Dilon under it anymore. And then it popped, sending blood spraying everywhere. The blood collected in one place and then seemed to take on a life of it's own. It turned and went straight for Kayden with all the force of a waterfall.

He couldn't get out of the way, and then Niall was in front of him. He took the attack to the chest and doubled over.

"Niall!"

Dilon was laughing. Was this part of his plan too? Niall was clutching at his chest, Kayden knelt down beside him.

"What's going on?"

Niall convulsed and then jolted back, looking up at Kayden, his eyes red. He stood, the motion in itself awkward, graceless. His mind was not his own.

"Can you kill your friend?" Dilon asked, his laughter echoing around them. "Can you do it? Can you? Huh? I can't hear you! Answer me, Fade-boy! Can you kill your friend?"

Niall rushed towards him, staff at the ready. He wondered for a moment why Dilon would just send Niall into melee instead of using his spells, but he figured that Dilon thought this would just get Niall killed faster. Niall wasn't a fighter. Kayden wasn't about to let harm come to his friend.

He assessed the situation as he dodged and blocked the ungraceful swings of the staff. He considered knocking Niall out and turning his attention back to the clearly deranged Dilon, or he could continue standing here and taking the blows with his sword. He figured his stamina would outlast Dilon's blood magic. He could do it, right?

But as the assault continued, Kayden became more and more unsure of that. This was taking too long and he needed to get out of the Fade. He could just imagine Morrigan watching him now. Telling him to just kill Niall and Dilon and get it over with. Kayden couldn't do that though. Niall was his best friend and while Dilon probably was deserving of it, Kayden wouldn't be the one to pass judgment. Tranquility though, he could achieve that by killing him in the Fade. But how would he do that with Niall's body being thrown at him like a toy?

Then it hit him; Dilon used to be egged on by his friends in the past. He always had to look cool in front of them. His friends may not have been in the Fade with him now, but Kayden figured the same ego would still apply here. He'd shut that lunatic up yet.

Kayden turned his head toward Dilon, blocking Niall's staff again. His lips twisted into a grin. "Is that all you have, Dilon? You're just going to let someone else do your dirty work for you?"

"Of course, this is much too fun to watch. Fade-boy versus Niall, the timid tutor. It made me sick how he used to baby you, how refreshing to see him finally taking out his frustrations."

"You're controlling him!"

"I am in his mind, yes, but I'm sure he got sick of taking care of you. Coddling you took so much of his time. He probably would have taken his Harrowing much sooner if it hadn't been for you."

Kayden gritted his teeth. Dilon was not going to make things easy for him, was he? He wasn't going to give in now though. He had to get out of here, and he was going to bring Niall with him. He let the grin spread on his lips again. "What happened, Dilon? Your friends aren't here right now so you're too scared to fight me on your own?"

Dilon viably twitched, his laugher dying out. "What was that?"

His voice had taken on an angry tone, good that meant Kayden had finally gotten to him. Kayden raised his voice, taking on a more haughty tone. "Oh, maybe you didn't hear me over all that trembling you're doing over there. I'll say it more clearly for you then; are you afraid I'll kick your ass?"

Dilon growled, "You know what, Fade-boy? You must have a death wish."

With that Niall dropped in front of him, Dilon had removed his control. Perfect. He didn't wait, rushing forward with his sword raised. But Dilon hadn't dropped his guard, and before he realized it, the other mage had pulled out a blade.

The blade came up and connected with Oathkeeper. It was a short blade, barely more than a dagger. How much he knew how to use this weapon, Kayden was unsure, but Dilon didn't seem to be using it the way a man trained for melee combat would. The blade was rippling with electricity, it was being used to channel magical energy.

Dilon tried to push him back as they continued back, Kayden could only assume he needed more range for the short blade's energy to take better effect. In the Fade, Kayden realized he was able to draw in more energy. It made sense, he had always been told magic was from the Fade, and Kayden...

One wrong step and a jolt of electricity burned through him. He jerked away, his muscles twitching in protest. He screamed, the sound echoing throughout the Fade. Somewhere behind him, he could sense movement. But from where? Niall?

Dilon cackled, his laughter blending with the sparks of electricity that crackled and buzzed about his blade.

Kayden quickly composed himself and blocked the short sword as it slashed at him again. "You know, Dilon, there's something I'm noticing here. We're both adults now, and yet you continue to cling to things you did as a child."

Dilon slashed, electricity arcing towards Kayden again. "And what does that mean? I was given and order, and I'm going to follow it. I will rejoin Master Uldred and the others."

"Ha! Do you really think so? He's a blood mage, he's only out for himself. Do you think he cares about you or any of the others who follow him? All you've proven to me is that you're just as big of a shit as you were when we were children."

Dilon gritted his teeth and the electricity around his blade expanded and spread towards Kayden. It was coming at him fast. He jumped back and summoned up a wall of ice before him, blocking the charges. The ice melted as soon as the light came in contact with it, but both elements fizzed and disappeared.

He tried to push back, but he had given Dilon more than enough distance for him to unleash another shocking attack, this time leaving him paralyzed to the spot. Try as he might, he couldn't will his muscles to move. He was helpless.

Dilon was standing before him now, that wicked grin still on his face. "Any last words, Fade-boy?"

Kayden's eyes only narrowed in response, hoping beyond hope that Niall would get up and help. But the mage didn't move, his collapsed form still silent behind him. _Niall_...

"I guess not. I will enjoy this," Dilon continued, raising the electrified blade once more. He couldn't move, he couldn't even brace himself for the blow. He closed his eyes, waiting to wake up without his emotions in tact, but the blow never came.

There was a thud in front of him. He opened his eyes. There was a shocked look on Dilan's face and a blade protruding from his chest, smearing blood on the ground below him, fading in and out of view. The blade receded, pulling out Dilon and he fell over, his body beginning to disappear from view. He blinked and looked up, expecting to see Niall standing over him. What he saw was the last thing he ever expected to see. It was himself. As if he were viewing himself in a mirror.

"Who... Who are you?" Kayden asked, his voice shaky.

The mirror image of himself grinned. "Isn't it obvious? I'm you. Well sorta, I'm your magic mostly, your connection to the Fade. We should probably wake up Niall over there if you want to keep going."

Kayden turned around when the other pointed to Niall behind him on the floor. He seemed to be just regaining consciousness. Kayden walked over to him and crouched over, trying to help Niall up.

"Did you... did you stop him?" Niall asked. He seemed weaker now somehow and was having trouble standing. Kayden had to put an arm around him to keep him on his feet.

"Yeah, Dilon's gone. Well he's not in the Fade anymore at least." He then turned his eyes back to his mirror 'self'. "How do I know you're not lying? That you're not another demon trying to take my body?"

Mirror Kayden raised an eyebrow. "Let's start with, I know everything about you... well me, I'm like... over 9000 percent smarter than any demon here in the Fade, and I don't want your body. I mean, it's kinda sorta mine already to begin with since you know... I'm you."

"You're quite humble too... But that really isn't enough for me. This could be a trick, in fact, I'm sure of it."

"Well yeah, whatever. I'm not really here to convince you that I'm you, I'm here to help you get your friends and find your way to the Sloth demon. Up until now, you've mostly been walking in circles. You... I am a Grey Warden now. We don't have time to be in a Fade dream as the Blight grows around us in the waking world. We have bigger things to think about than trying to find our way in the Fade. And trust me, as your connection to the Fade, I know how big of a pain it is to navigate."

"You're leading us into a trap, aren't you?" Niall finally spoke up. He pulled away from Kayden and was standing on his own now, looking over the mirror version of Kayden. The only difference he noted between the two was that the Fade version was wearing muted greys. Probably so he would blend into the Fade. Or maybe it was to represent his status as a Grey Warden. Kayden wasn't sure, but it didn't really matter.

Mirror Kayden laughed and turned his back to them. He raised his hands, causing them to look around the Fade version of the broken Harrowing chamber again. Above them, three visions appeared. Three nightmares and in the center of each was one of his friends. Alistair, Wynne, Alim... Zevran. He could see what they were dreaming of as well, Wynne with apprentices, Alistair with who he thought was family, Zevran being tortured by Crows. When he reached Alim though, Alim was having a dream about Kayden. Their first night together to be exact.

Kayden looked away. "Why are you showing me that?"

"And that's what you're going to ask me? What a boring question. Why not, how do I get to them so I can wake them up? That's probably the best idea now right? We don't have time to sit around wondering silly things like that. They're all in nightmares. Blight happening in the real world. Get with the program, Kade."

"I hate to say this, Kade, but I think he's right," Niall chimed in, watching the visions blur into the Fade once more. "Who should we rescue first, and how will we get to them?"

"At least one of us has some sense..." Mirror said. He led them towards the center of the Harrowing chamber. A pedestal was there. Kayden remembered it being filled with lyrium when he took his Harrowing. Now, it was full of a black, opaque liquid. What it was, he didn't know, but it didn't matter, this was the Fade.

"This pedestal will get you anywhere in the Fade connected to the Sloth Demon's domain. You've been to a few places already, and gotten lost. Shameful. Now we will use this to get to them." He pointed back up into the grey sky where the images had been. "Who first?"

"Alim," Niall answered for him. He slowly nodded. He had thought it might be better to get Alistair back first since he was another Grey Warden, but Niall was probably right. Alim should come first. They were best friends once... more than friends really, it would be wrong not to.

"Alright Kade, Niall... Go get him. Just walk up to the pedestal and tell it where you need to go. There will be one on the other side that you can use to return here. I will stay here in case any more demons come. But I think you've defeated all the guardians already, so there really shouldn't be any trouble."

"You're not coming with us?"

"As I said, guarding home base. I'll know what's going on anyway. I can see through your eyes."

"Why can't I see through yours?"

Mirror Kayden looked shocked by the thought. "You... can't? Well it took dad a while to get used to as well. It will come with time, the stronger your connection to the Fade grows. Now hurry, everyone's waiting for you."

"Dad?"

"That is a question for another time! Hurry up!"

"Are you sure we should be trusting him?" Niall asked as they reached the pedestal. Kayden raised his hand above the stone basin atop the pedestal, mirroring his Harrowing.

"I don't trust him. I need to save our friends, so that's what I am doing. We'll have to keep an eye on him of course."

Niall nodded and reached out for the basin as well. The liquid began to glow and expanded, engulfing them both in the radiance as the room around them dissolved and a new one reformed around them.

When the glow faded, they were in the room with Alim. Now the hard part, convincing him he was in a dream and not really under the covers with Kayden. He didn't even want to look.

"Niall..."

"Oh grow up, you two used to go at it all the time."

"Yeah, but that doesn't mean I want to see it after..."

"Shush, just go wake him up."

Kayden walked over to the bed. It was a bottom bunk in the apprentice quarters. It still surprised him how they were ever able to find time to do this when so many people shared the room, without anyone noticing. Doing it in the middle of the day when others were in classes helped, but they had to find just the right window of time.

"Alim, wake up." He said, nudging the elf's arm. He tilted his head to the side, barely noticing anything. Moments later though his eyes widened as he finally registered what was going on.

"TWO of you?" His voice raised and he looked back and forth between the two Kaydens.

"Two of me? Alim, look at me, no one else is here," the other said to him. Kayden narrowed his eyes and pulled fake Kayden away from Alim.

"He's not real, Alim! Wake up!"

Alim closed his eyes for a moment and sighed. "I... know this is a dream but... I'd rather things stay like this."

"Snap out of it, Alim! We can't stay here!"

"You don't need me! You were perfectly clear about that!"

"Alim... this... This is not the time for that! There's a Blight to stop and we're wasting our time here. The Circle needs you... I _need_ you. So please, come with us."

Fake Kayden faded away as Alim pulled the covers up around him. He shook his head. "I... I don't want to go."

Kayden looked back at Niall. The man was just quietly watching. "A little help, please?"

Niall was next to him before he even realized it. "Alim, stop this. This isn't real. Would you really rather die?"

Alim looked at Niall. "You don't understand! Haven't you ever been in love before?"

Niall's eyes narrowed. "Yes, I have. You are being selfish now. Look at us, we are real, we are your friends. Think about how we would feel if you didn't come back with us."

Alim's lip quivered. "I... I can't go with you."

"Alim..." Kayden was almost in tears now. He turned around and paced for a moment and then before he knew it, he was back beside Alim, pulling him away from the bed into an embrace. "You idiot, I can't let you throw your life away for a fake existence. How am I supposed to live knowing that?"

He didn't know how this would help and in the back of his mind, he expected Alim to push him away, but instead, the little elf clung to him, sobbing into his clothes. He wasn't sure how long they sat there, but eventually Alim pulled away and wiped his eyes. "All right. I will come back with you."

A few minutes later, he was dressed and the three of them were at the pedestal, extending their hands over the basin that led them back to the Fade Harrowing chamber.

"That certainly took long enough," Mirror Kayden said, rolling his eyes. "We don't have any more time to waste. Maybe the three of you should split up and wake up the rest of them." He gestured to the sky where images of the other dreamers appeared again.

Alim looked back at Kayden, "Seriously? Another one of you? And I thought one was more than I could handle."

Kayden just laughed, "Well that technically isn't another me, at least that's what he said." Kayden shrugged.

"Alim, you wake up Wynne," Mirror Kayden said, pointing to her dream. Alim nodded, that was probably the best match there, considering Wynne had personally mentored Alim.

Alim accessed the pedestal again and dissolved from their sight. "Okay, then Niall, you talk to Alistair. I'm going to go for Zevran."

Niall nodded and he watched the other man disappear. "Well here it goes... me."

"Hurry up, and try not to be too flirty."

"Because I need you - er, me - to tell me that?"

Ten minutes later, Kayden and Alim returned to the chamber. Niall wasn't back yet, had he failed?

"He's having trouble, yes," Mirror Kayden said, as if he could read minds. Which probably was likely, considering he was Kayden.

"Why?" Alim asked.

"Alistair doesn't know who he is, nothing's working. Kade. It looks like you may need to step in.

Kayden let out a deep sigh and nodded. Niall probably wouldn't be able to convince Alistair to wake up on his own, and they were running out of time. He accessed the pedestal once more, leaving Alim with Mirror Kayden.

Once in the dream, he could see that Alistair was with a woman, someone he thought was family or something. Alistair hadn't told him much about his family, so Kayden couldn't really be sure who she was.

"Things not working out, Niall?" Kayden asked as he approached the timid mage.

Niall shook his head. "Not one bit. He keeps asking me who I am. Maybe you can talk some sense into him."

"Oh! It's my friend, Kade! Goldanna, this is who I was talking about. Kade, this is my sister Goldanna. Would you like to stay for dinner? Please say you'll stay!" The man was pleading with him.

"I see what you mean, Niall."

"At least he knows who you are, but he won't stop talking."

"Alistair, this is a dream, that is not Goldanna, or whoever you think it is."

"Oh haha. That's really funny, Kade. Who else would look and act just like my sweet sister? Why would someone want to trick me?"

"Where is Morrigan when I need her?" Kayden asked no one in particular and took a deep breath. Niall shot him a look, one that couldn't possibly mean anything other than 'Who is Morrigan?' It didn't matter now, it wasn't important. Right now, he needed to get Alistair out of here.

"Morrigan? She'd ruin all my fun. Bitch, bitch, bitch. Oh, Alistair, I don't want to talk about my mother, let's talk about _your_ mother." Alistair pitched his voice high for the second part, his best impression of Morrigan falling rather short.

"Alistair, stop for a minute and think about how you got here. We are in the Fade. We were just in the Circle Tower. We are trapped here by the Sloth Demon." Kayden reminded him.

"We... by the Maker, I think you might be right."

The demon masquerading as Goldanna did not like that one bit, and soon they found themselves being attacked by her and other Fade demons. When it was over, Alistair pulled Kayden aside. "Please... I'd be very much appreciative if you didn't tell Morrigan about any of this?"

Kayden laughed. "You have my word."

Then Alistair was gone, waking up like the others he hoped, and they returned to the Harrowing chamber once again. Alim and Mirror Kayden seemed to be ignoring each other for the most part.

"So... it's time to face the Sloth demon then? How will we get to him?" Kayden asked.

Mirror Kayden pointed at the pedestal again. "That is your ticket to the demon. He's at the center of this domain, and you've already defeated all the demons guarding him."

"Any advice?" Alim asked, meeting Niall and Kayden in the center of the chamber.

"I can't really think of anything that will really help you. Just remember, you are in the Fade and this domain we are in belongs to him. If you want to defeat him, you will have to give it your all."

"Will you be coming with us this time?" Niall asked. Kayden was already rearing to go. The sloth demon had to be defeated now so they could wake up and take care of Uldred.

Mirror Kayden nodded. "I am a Grey Warden. Your quest is my quest."

The group gathered around the pedestal, ready to face the demon in its domain. They appeared on a cliff overlooking the Fade sky. The Black City seemed closer than Kayden had ever seen before. Would even a demon wish to be this close to something so cursed?

"I am disappointed." The Sloth demon stood at the center of the rocky floating land mass, towering above the group. "Why did you have to leave? I thought you were happy? All of you be good and go back... I will give you better dreams this time."

"We are not living a lie here in the Fade. We have a Blight to stop," Kayden said. The others added their agreement.

"Why must you continue to fight this war? What good does it do to fight?"

"It is my duty as a Grey Warden."

"The darkspawn are not a threat to you here. You could live in peace."

"And doom the rest of the world? I think not. You die here, demon. I am done talking to you."

The fight began with a clap of thunder. Alim moved forward to attack the demon as it came toward them. Magic clashed against magic, and Kayden and his mirror brought up shields of ice to keep the demon's elements at bay. Niall held back healing any injuries they received.

After what seemed an eternity, Sloth dropped before them, Oathkeeper against his neck. "We can end this now. I will give you a deal. Whatever it is you want."

"No deal." And with that, he struck through the demon. It was over. Somehow, Kayden had expected that battle to be harder. All it really had been was long. It had been easy. Too easy, to the point that the victory seemed false. But now that the demon was slain, they could wake up and deal with Uldred.

"Kade." Niall started, staring at the ground. "There is something I need to tell you now. Alone."

Kayden looked to his friend. "Hm? What's up?"

Niall pulled him aside, away from Alim, and began in a hushed tone. "Kayden, I can't return with you."

"Oh no, don't say that. You're coming back with me." Kayden said, grabbing Niall by the sleeve. "I told you, we're all getting out of this."

"I'm sorry. It's not that I want to stay here, I really don't. I've been in the Fade far too long. I'm dying Kayden. Take the litany... from my body."

"Don't talk like that! You can be healed! We'll take care of you!"

"It's too late. Take the litany and stop Uldred. And... My spellbook. Take it. You can learn all my spells from that."

"Niall! I am not leaving without you! You are coming with us!"

The Fade began to disappear from view now that the Sloth demon was no longer keeping them there. Kayden kept trying to grab at Niall, but they kept drifting away from one another.

"I will see you again one day, Kade. They say... we go to the Maker's side when we die. It can't be all that bad." Niall smiled, a forced smile Kayden knew.

"Niall!"

Kayden's eyes opened and he was back in the tower in the chamber where he had fallen. He stood up and rushed over to the slumped body he knew was Niall's. Alim stood and followed him to Niall, as the others watched, unsure what to say.

"Wynne! Alim! Heal him!" Kayden was panicking. He held Niall's head in his lap and Alim ran his hands over Niall's body, a blue glow enveloping them.

"It's no use!" Alim's voice was a low whine as he gasped for air, tears filling his eyes. "It's not working!"

"You're not doing it right! Come on, Alim! Niall! Niall! Wake up!" Kayden's hands moved to Niall's shoulders and shook, gently at first, but quickly became urgent.

Wynne shook her head. "I'm sorry, Kayden... Alim. But Niall... is gone."

"No! This can't be! He's still stuck in the Fade! I can go back in. I can bring him back! I have to do something!"

"We've done everything we could. There's no healing this."

He could still feel that hand ruffling his hair, see the smile on Niall's face whenever Kayden went to visit him, how tall Niall used to seem to him when he was younger and how he laughed years later when he realized he'd grown taller than Niall. The warm, kind voice that soothed him whenever the other apprentices had been bullying him. The friend that had made him feel safe in a world full of templar, in a world full of hate and misunderstanding.

Kayden went very quiet for a moment, his eyes watching Niall's lifeless body. He was really gone, and there was nothing he could have done to save him. At one time Niall and Jowan had been all Kayden had, he had never thought that one day he'd lose either of them. Yet here Niall was before him, unmoving, not breathing. This was too much.

He let out a small wimper, choking back tears. He tried so much to push them away as they filled his eyes. This wasn't happening. His head lowered more, and for a moment it rested on Niall's shoulder. He had withered so much, he was barely bones wrapped in skin. The demon really had sucked him dry.

And then it all came rushing to him at once, and he could hold it back no longer. His scream echoed through the hall, his heart pounding so hard he thought it would burst. The tears forced themselves out now on their own. This wasn't real... This isn't real. Stop crying, he told himself.

A hand touched his shoulder and he pulled away. "Don't touch me! Don't you fucking touch me!"

"Kayden..." Wynne was trying to sooth him, but it wasn't working. He didn't care at all about her, or what she said. The demon had taken Niall from him, and he knew who was to blame. Uldred.

"Maker, show him mercy, for I will not," Kayden whispered and pulled himself to his feet. His sword dragged across the floor and his eyes narrowed. "Uldred is dead!"

"Kayden!" Wynne's voice was pleading with him now, but he ignored her. He was already running up the last set of stairs, his sword seeking blood. It would find blood, _he _would find blood. He would stain the Harrowing chamber with every last bit of Uldred's blood.


End file.
